Sticky Fingers

He is home.

2010-05-16T21:05:00.000-07:00

Click HERE to see the video of Jasper's home coming. For some reason I couldn't get it to post properly on my blog...it was all cut in half.

I would have posted this earlier, but I've been a little distracted. :) My sweet friend Rachel put it together for me. She captured it perfectly.

Now it's time to pack for Disney world. :)

Conviction

2010-04-07T20:29:00.000-07:00

Psalm 139:14
For YOU created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.
1 Peter 3:3-4

Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes. Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God's sight.

1 Samuel 16:7

But the LORD said to Samuel, "Do not consider his appearance or his height, for I have rejected him. The LORD does not look at the things man looks at. Man looks at the outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart."

Proverbs 31:3

Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised.

1 Timothy 4:8

Physical exercise has some value, but spiritual exercise is much more important, for it promises a reward in both this life and the next.

1 Corinthians 6: 19-20

Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your body.

Okay, so perhaps my last post was a bit harsh. My focus, obviously off. Perhaps I was losing touch of whats really important here. I am, by nature extremely hard on myself. About everything.

I just had a baby.

These things take time.

The three letter swear word

2010-04-06T19:21:00.000-07:00

I hate being FAT.

And for those of you oh so nice people that say "Noooo, you look great!" You are crazy and the Bible says not to lie.

Before having children my BMI was 20.1 Now its friggin 26.5

I walk past a mirror and think "Oh my gosh. Who is THAT??" It's like living in a fat suit EVERYDAY.

THIS is so not me.

So yeah, I'm fat. I'm fat and It's really getting to me. My self confidence is at about a -20 on a scale 0-10.

EW.

Life has been crazy for me and I have taken comfort in all the wrong foods. I was hoping to lose weight before Jasper came home...I kinda gained a few. That's when I wanna throw the scale and just scream WTF?!? Yes. The scale truly can induce some ugly swear words.

I KNOW with Jasper home I'll be able to lose weight. I mean who wants to stuff a whole bag of chocolate down your throat in front of your husband right? Plus the whole reason for the stuffing of the chocolate was because of his absense. SOOOO at least we can eliminate that much. Exercising? Perhaps a couple sessions with a trainer? So I can get the fastest most effective results? Also Jasper will be home April 22nd (we think) and won't go back to work till a couple days into June and I was thinking maybe he could drop the kids off at school, me at the gym (we're a one car family now), then pick the kids up and then me up after that. Which would give me a SOLID 3 hours at the gym. That would be AMAZING. I'm sure he'd love the special alone time with the babies too. Anyway, just some thoughts I'm knocking around in my head.

SIGH...

Wish this wasn't so hard.

Glad to know this is the last time I'll be losing baby weight.

Seriously.

We couldn't afford more kids even if we wanted more, so that's kinda what seals the deal ya know??

Any-whoo. Any one know of any weight loss products that help speed things up a bit? That aren't detrimental to your health of course. I've been looking into HCG weight loss injections. Seems interesting...

Dear Chandler & Skylar

2010-04-02T18:01:00.000-07:00

PLEASE, I beg of you, JUST. STOP. FIGHTING.

This whole at each others throats from dawn

until dusk EVERYDAY thing, is driving me INSANE.

Just stop.

Or I'm running away....

or at least locking myself in the bathroom.

Love,

Mommy

Ek is lief vir jou

2010-03-27T09:23:00.000-07:00

I know you are on a FB break right now, but I figure you would check your blog. I just wanted to leave a little note to tell you how much I love you and how much you mean to me. There is no one in this world that means more to me than you do. You were graciously sent into my life by our God, and to Him I am thankful. He has showered us with love and blessed us with happiness. He has made you a great mother and a perfect bride. You are still very interesting to me, even after five and a half years of marriage, not a day goes by that I am not amazed by you. There is so much about, so many little things that add up to make you, yet somehow you can be summarized as a gentle, loving, selfless, passionate woman. I take so much pride in being able to call you my wife. You are the one I get to spend forever with. You are the one who I get to feel butterflies for. You are the one who will hold my heart. You. You and You alone. There is no greater feeling knowing that this, what we have, is what I get to keep and look forward to everyday of my life. I love you Irene Joy Platt. I truly and honestly, from the bottom of my heart to the top, love you. You have given me so much happiness, you have sacrificed so much for us. I hope that I give you happiness and satisfaction that fills your cup, as you make mine overflow. I love you sweetie and I can't wait to wake up everyday until forever, with you next to me. I love you. Muah. XoXo

I live in a zoo.

2010-03-15T15:55:00.000-07:00

Jasper,

Please come home soon.

Thanks.

A trooper!

2010-03-09T17:46:00.000-08:00

She did great! She was in a lot of pain right after she woke up but the pain meds kicked in quick. Before the surgery she stole the show in the OR by singing ABC's with all the anesthesiologists. :) Gotta love this girl. :)

A nice and normal update. :)

2010-03-08T18:00:00.000-08:00

Just some pics that have nothing to do with this blog post. :)

Well hello there! It's been a while since we've had just a plain ole' update hasn't it? You know the list of 1-29 bullets because once I get going I find myself unable to stop and start posting things like what I had for lunch today. LOVE it! Why? Well lemme tell ya, it's BOOOORING and that means life may just be back to normal and oh how I have craved normal. Even if it's only been three days of normal and nothing (at least at this point) looming in the future that I have to DEAL with. These last 5+ months have seriously been LAME. Thankfully though I am quite certain that no deployment will ever be this hard again. I don't plan to have a baby without him again. :)

So lets update shall we?

1. Bright and early...well not bright I suppose. Leaving at 5:30am makes it dark. Okay so DARK and early tomorrow, I'm taking Skylar to get tempanostomy tubes put in her ears. She's had so many ear infections that it's caused her to have some hearing loss. Also the constant fluid in her ears causes everything to sound much quieter to her. Especially when she's sick. She couldn't hear me basically unless she could see me. She'd come right up to me and put her ear up to my mouth if she couldn't read my lips. It was crazy. Normally though it's just things like having the TV loud, having to repeat my self or speak loudly to her if she's not looking. She was also supposed to get a Tonsillectomy and Adnoidectomy but the Doctor told me she'd be really miserable for about a week. Apparently doing it around age 2 is better after that it gets harder. Plus we'd have to stay overnight for 1-2 nights for observation at the hospital so I just opted to do it when Jasper gets back so we can really love on her. Lets face it I couldn't be there for her like that with 3 others to take care of. SO anyway if you think of us in the AM pray that all goes well.

2. I had to RETAKE my drivers license written and drivers test last week. I WAS FREAKING OUT. If I didn't pass (I was worried about the written-It's been a few years!) they'd of taken my license away. Me+4 kids+no husband+no car=I can't even imagine. I had to retake it because apparently if you get in and accident + 1 ticket in 3 years (depending on the offense I suppose. I doubt they'd do this to you for a broken tail light) you are up for reexamination. Luckily I passed.

3. I gained 7 pounds. WHAT THE CRAZIES IS THAT ALL ABOUT?? Okay, okay, I know. I have become a stress eater. Which is odd b/c the last time he was gone for 7 months I did the opposite, I didn't eat at all. I looked great when he came home though lol! It's actually kinda sick. Like if I'm really stressed I feel like the smoker that reaches for their pack of cigaretts. I reach for my Lindor Truffles. We won't talk about that one night I ate a whole bag. I think 3 pounds of this has to be from that night. Oh well, you know it's been crazy for me and the added pressure of weight loss to impress Jasper just was making me stress. I drop weight very easily just by working out so I have no doubt I'll be back to my normal self a couple months after he gets back. I'll do my best now but know I'll really be able to amp it up when he's home. While he's giving baths or putting them to bed I can be working out in the nice gym on base. They even built us a pool, ONE BLOCK from our house. It's indoor. With a slide. HOLLA!

4. We've moved our vacation spot to California. We just really didn't want to spend so many days driving to Florida. We'll spend half our time in LA and the other half in San Deigo. We are going to go to Disneyland, Lego Land, Universal Studios, then head up to San Deigo and go to Sea World, the San Deigo Zoo, and hit up all the beautiful beaches. 2 weeks of BLISS. It will be our first REAL family vacation. We went to Disney world when Skylar was a baby and Chandler was 1. It was for my Mom's 50th birthday so they obviously don't remember much. I can't tell you how excited I am!!!! Another reason I'll be working hard to lose the weight when he gets back. June = bathing suit.

5. I'm currently typing on my brand spankin new TouchSmart. It's BEAUTIFUL. Once I get back into the picture taking groove it will be great for editing. The best thing is that we actually OWN it. We've probably never paid cash for anything over a couple hundered bucks in the last 5 years and with this I used my debit card. The debt was KILLING us before. I'm comfortable saying it now but it was so bad that our weekly food and toiletries budget was $50 A WEEK. I remember when we got to the car after "grocery shopping" I would just bawl my eyes out. I clearly remember crying a couple weeks before Jasper left wanting to buy some Salmon but had to settle for tuna helper. It was hard. The week he left we went to the Zoo and had to split the payment on two credit cards WITH a cupon. So thanks to Germany we are almost free of debt and breathing again. We've sworn off credit cards. If we can't pay for it we wait for it. We are harldly "rollin in the dough" by any means. Jasper is still a Senior Airman and we have four kids, but to us it feels amazing.

6. I'm learning A LOT from God right now. How to hear him, seek approval from only him, things about raising my kids, about being a wife. It requires a whole post of it's own. I'm getting to that.

7. JASPER COMES HOME IN 30-45 DAYS!!!!

6. We are praying about moving to California. Jasper could take a teaching Job (still in the Air Force) and I could pursue a few passions of my own. We'll see. We have some good time to get a clear answer.

8. Dawson seems to still be struggling a bit with coughing and congestion. He just can't seem to shake it completly yet but he's happy and sleeping much better...even though it's in a swing. He's never spent the night in his crib-he hates sleeping on his back or side. He goes in the swing at 8 has a bottle at 11, back in the swing then again between 2-3 he has a bottle, swing, and then again bottle at 6 and ready for the day or at least a couple hours before his nap. In the swing. :) He can sleep where ever he wants. I'm FINALLY getting some more zzz's. AGAIN, THANK YOU JESUS!

9. For lunch I had a chik-fil-a salad with a lemonaid. :)

That's all for now folks! I'd say I'm sorry if this was boring, but I'm not!!!

2010-02-27T07:25:00.001-08:00

God, who foresaw your tribulation, has specially armed you to go through it, not without pain but without stain . - CSLewis

Alligator

2010-02-26T17:02:00.001-08:00

Skylar: "Chandler, you gonna go up that alligator?"

Chandler: "What??"

Skylar: "Up the alligator?"

Chandler: "Noooo, Skylar. ELEVATOR."

Skylar: "Oh."

Chandler: "El"

Skylar: "El"

Chandler: "Le"

Skylar: "Le"

Chandler: "Vator"

Skylar: "Vator"

Chandler: "Elevator."

Skylar: "Alligator."

Weight loss

2010-02-17T19:34:00.000-08:00

The time has come once again to shed this last bit of baby weight. By bit I mean 30 pounds. Ooooh boy. Starting out is always tough but once I get committed it's a lot of fun. Also I have some fantastic motivating factors this time around.

1. I wanna impress Jasper when he comes home. I know I won't be able to lose it all but he left when I was 6 months pregnant so no matter what I'll look skinner right? :)

2. I'll get a REEEALLY nice shopping spree curtosy of my husband. I've been bouncing around sizes for five years so it will be nice to have all new clothes and actually be able to fit in them for more than a few months. We are out of the baby making buissness.

3. I am getting a tummy tuck hopefully by the end of the year. I was real thin and small before I got pregnant and that led to a not so nice looking tummy after my first pregnancy. Not one I wanna live with for the next 70 years. I've found a great sugeon in Denver that I like who has incredible results.

Wish me luck!! I might start a blog on my progress if anyone wants to follow.

Joy will come

2010-02-08T07:19:00.000-08:00

I can't say the last few months have been easy in the slightest. I sometimes wonder why everything had to come crashing as soon as Jasper left. Things were pretty boring and normal before he did and I like it that way!

I was basically forced to move because of the threat if I didn't I would have to move in February (they are tearing down the old houses on base) with a new baby and there possibly would be no houses available on Schriever. So not knowing what the future held I decided to take the plunge and move myself and 3 kids to a new house. Unpacking at 8 months pregnant alone with 3 kids was hard.

Our new house:

Then Ethan got Pneumonia and was really sick. All of us actually went through so many colds and flu issues it's hard to keep track.

Then we went through this:

Three accidents in two weeks. First one was bad-my fault. The van ended up with $7,000 in repairs and still has to go back. The second one-not my fault- caused me to have a huge breakdown. The third - not my fault- I almost found humorous in a dark kind of way because really who does that happen to? It wasn't bad at all really but the possibility remains that we have to pay the deductible for the repairs for an accident that wasn't my fault because of the other persons insurance issues. Still not sure haven't heard back.

Then I had the baby without Jasper here. Beautiful baby, beautiful birth, but very difficult process to deal with without the support of your husband. When I think of his birth (the days following) I felt so robbed of the experience. Driving myself home from the hospital literally weeping. My husband wasn't there to take care of me, I had to take care of all my kids and it made me feel like I was missing the experience of just cuddling with my newborn, learning how to nurse, and enjoying family time. Instead it was busy. Laundry, dishes, cooking, etc. I was emotional and didn't really feel like there was someone who could comfort me like my husband could. So I just kind of pulled away I guess. Not really letting anyone know what I was going through. I had a little breakdown...again...and so my mom started coming up everyday for a few hours to help me clean. That helped a lot. Also a friend had set up some of my friends to make meals for me. Seriously it's amazing how just meals and cleaning can make a huge difference.

Christmas morning for me was really hard, but tried to make the best of it for the kids.

Finally got my van back mid January. It was hard driving around in this tiny car with four kids! 3 in the back, one up front.

Okay so FINALLY things should start to let up a little right? I'm moved in, I have had the baby, the car is back, everyone is healthy, kids just started back in school, normal should start right about here. NOPE. My sweet 1 month old lands himself right in the hospital with RSV. We are on day four of being here.

They've stuck tubes up his nose, tubes down his throat, he's been gasping for his breaths which is the hardest thing I've ever had to watch. The first time I skyped his Daddy in to see him, his Daddy broke down in tears at the sight. He's so small and it's honestly just scary. Ethan had RSV and was in the same hospital EXACTLY a year ago, isn't that just crazy? Here is that post. He was 6 months when he had it so his body was stronger and fought it more easily.

So here I am. My baby in the hospital, my mom taking care of my kids (2 who are sick) and I'm just amazed at how heavy the last few months have been. There's a few things I've noticed/learned:

People start to distance themselves from you. Perhaps they aren't sure they can say "I'm so sorry you are going through this" again, or just don't know what to say to you anymore so they just kind of dissapear. Which is hard but understandable. I mean you just run out of things to say to someone!

My mom has become an incredible second mother of three: She can handle three kids with ease now. They've had many sleepovers with Grandma lately and I think it's made her young again. :) Ethan adores her and honestly chooses her over me sometimes which I have to resist the urge of being jealous because I'm so happy he's had such an amazing Grandma who loves him so much and makes him so comfortable. He couldn't be in better hands.

Jasper and I have become incredibly close. Learning how to pray for each other so much. We have developed incredible communication with each other. Incredible respect for what each other are going through (can you imagine how hard it must be for him to just sit back and hear about all his family is going through and not be able to physically help. A man takes care of his family and to not be able to be here must be so painful). We've fallen more in love with each other and appreciate each other so much more. It's amazing what you don't realize what you have untill it's temporarily removed. I don't think I'll ever complain about him working a lot or whatever the case may be. To have one day with him or one hug, one hour even would provide so much strength and I took that somewhat for granted before.

It's okay for me to say this sucks or to talk about how hard things really are. Because things are hard and there is no shame in that. Some people can perceive it as whining, perhaps because they don't know how else to react and others have offered a helping hand. Keeping things bottled up is just so unhealthy.

SO why has all this happened the moment Jasper left? I'm not sure. God's teaching me to rely on him more which is an invaluable lesson, Jasper and I have become closer which is priceless, and I've learned to appreciate the little things more. As corney as that sounds. Do I want the drama to be over? YES!!! I'm SOOOO ready for normal. To spend a Saturday cleaning house along side my husband sounds like a dream right now. Going to the Zoo as a family seems like a fairy tale! lol SO normal will be nice and I'm ready.

On the plus side, we've paid off over $14,000 in debt since he's been gone. Have money put away for a 2 week Disney vacation which I think we deserve. :) 8 more weeks till he's home. Sounds short and easy to do but I think I've learned that I just can't expect things to calm down. If they do, I'll welcome the pleasant surprise, if they don't well I've gotten pretty tough and am sure I can get through anything even if it's hard. This song has helped me through a lot. Joy WILL come, knowing that brings me peace.

Keep Dawson in your prayers!

My sweet boy

2010-01-31T21:34:00.000-08:00

Dawson Edward Platt
December. 23. 2009
3:40 am
6 pounds 13 oz
19 inches

He's a dream. I'm so in love. He's been a very special blessing to me and I'll tell you how in a post soon to come. Sorry for the delay in announcement, I'm sure you can imagine that I have been busy. :)

And yes, for all my fellow Twilight friends out there his middle name is after the Edward. :)

Oh and PS it was an ALL natural birth too! Birth story soon to come also. Ouch. :)

HP touchsmart

2009-12-09T19:54:00.000-08:00

Okay so I don't usually try and win stuff off blogs but MckMama is giving away a HP TouchSmart and I just can't resist! I hope I win! Go here http://mckgiveaways.blogspot.com/2009/12/hp-touchsmart-giveaway.html for a chance to win yourself!

So that's a breakdown...

2009-12-06T17:19:00.000-08:00

In the last month I've moved into a new house with about 1 weeks notice, for the most part unpacked my whole house by myself (even though I had a lot of offers to help-I moved to the middle of nowhere and it was just more convenient to do it little by little while the kids slept) and most recently been in two car accidents in two days. The first of which threw me into two days of painful contractions every few minutes.

Lets rewind a bit. I've decided recently to give up the idea of induction and any sort of medications during birth. Big step for me since I was so determined to make this birth convenient for me since my husband is deployed. However after much persistence (in a good way-perhaps we'll say encouragement rather than persistence...persistent encouragement ;) ) from a friend who has a serious passion for natural birthing and research of my own I became convinced too that a natural birth is absolutely the best option for my baby and for myself. It's amazing how much you learn if you are open minded. Issues I've had in the past AFTER birth that I never would have considered to relate to the drugs very well may have been the reason for those issues. Anyway...lets stay on track...I've been doing The Bradley Method classes (okay more of a crash course-it's normally a 12 week thing) with my friend who is an instructor and we reached a point of talking about the coach (typically the best option would obviously be the father) and it REALLY threw me into an emotional mess. How come the first time I'm having a baby naturally and will really need to be coached happens to be the only birth my husband will miss? I tried to convince myself to get induced and just forget the whole thing but once you have the knowledge about drugs you just can't block it out like that. It's like if something looks good that you are about to eat and then you find out it's really something disgusting...you just can't eat it. SO I was unsuccessful at convincing myself. And was left feeling....emotionally distraught, as I got closer to the day that Dawson comes and I will have to do it without my husband holding my hand and him telling me how much he loves me and how proud he is of me. THANKFULLY I do have people in my life that will be there for me and help coach me through it. I just hope I can do it without him. It's AMAZING how much strength your husband brings you. People have thought that the hard part about a deployment is doing all the work by your self. Cooking, cleaning, taking care of the kids etc. It's not. That stuff that seemed hard in the past when my husband would work seven fourteen hour days in a row and I would only see him an hour or so at night seems easy now. If only I could have one hour a week to hold him or get to go to sleep cuddling one night a week, what a world of difference it would make. There is power in physical presence and touch. I'm telling you. Kiss and hold your hubby at night before you complain about your hard day and it might just fix everything. ANYWAY...I'm off track again huh? All that is to say I've been feeling very emotional about him not being here for and after the birth.

Car accident number one: completely my fault. I was going down a hill 40mph or so and a sippy cup rolled under my break before I had time to think the black car in front of me flashed. then everything just flashed black. then I screamed. then black. then I heard that horrible sound of crashing metal. then Ethan crying. It's like things move slowly and in flashes when that stuff happens. The other kids were okay, once Skylar realized what happened she started to cry. No one was seriously hurt. The guy I hit seemed a little in shock so I made the calls to the police. In a way for the safety of the sweet little boy I'm holding inside me the accident was the "perfect accident". My van hit the other car and basically my bumper went under his car. Completely smashed everything above my bumper. My bumper where the air bag sensors sit was hardly damaged and that's most likely why my airbags didn't deploy. If they had, I certainly would have broken some ribs and who knows what else. I wish I had taken a picture, it looks pretty crazy to see the top all smashed with a perfect bumper. At the time I felt fine and with in half an hour or so I started having a few contractions. I figured it was just from the stress. Then a couple hours after, my ribs and back really started to hurt. I called my doctor and they wanted me to come in. I spent a few hours there (my friend Rachel left work to be with me) and they ran some test to see if there was...I forget the word...damage to the placenta. It came back negative but my contractions were all over the place. They wanted to keep me over night for monitoring but I decided to go home instead to care for my babies who were all running fevers between 101 to 103 with the promise that I would return if things got any worse. There is a 48 hour window for the risk of serious trauma. My contractions lasted all through the night and I didn't really sleep, nor did Ethan coughing and feeling yucky. I had stayed the night at my Moms since she watched the babies while I was at the hospital and we left the house around 5am to go back to my house. I came back expecting my dog to have made a big mess since she'd been inside since noon the previous day but she showed me grace and there was still order in the home. :) Good doggy. She got big treats and belly rubs. I slept on the couch for about 45 minutes while my Mom cleaned my kitchen and tidied up the down stairs. Gotta love Moms. Then unenthusiastically I went with her to the rental place to get a rental car. I kept saying that I didn't want to drive but knew I was just being silly.

Accident #2. Paranoid the whole time, I parted ways with my Mom went to the grocery store to pick up a few things. Called my hubby while I sat in the parking lot and told him that I missed him so much and that I felt so overwhelmed. I told him I was paranoid about driving and he said I'd probably feel that way for a couple weeks. We hung up. I started the engine. And home we were headed. Home to relax. I sat at the light waiting for my arrow to turn green... when I heard that loud metal sound again and my car jerked forward. Instantly tears were streaming and instantly Skylar started crying "Not again, not again..." all three kids were bawling this time. All of our emotions had been spent already. None of us needed this. The damage wasn't too bad at all but that meant nothing. I had lost it. I'm certain the lady thought I was crazy for freaking out that much over it. At first she tried to deny that her car could have made the damage because the shape of her BMW didn't match up to it (the cop later disagreed-obviously) but I told her and held in my hand proof that just two hours ago we had done a walk around the car before I signed to rent the car and there were NO damages to the brand new vehicle. I kept crying and crying and as the minutes passed the harder I cried. I, at one point felt like I was forcing my self to inhale. My parents came and I hid in the car. My dad filled out the paper work and all I did was sign. The cop and everyone else looked at me like I was crazy. I felt a little crazy. I was not crying about this small little accident I was crying because I couldn't handle anything else. I couldn't handle thinking about my children upset. My painful contractions that STILL had not subsided. My husband who was NOT there to console me. (Note: I had also had about 1-2 hours sleep the previous night.) I begged him on the phone to see if he could come home for just two weeks. I was hysterical. It was kind of out of body really. I've always wondered what it would actually feel like to have a break down...and there I was having one...in front of strangers. Sigh...

Finally after going to bed at 7 (even though I woke up literally every hour with kids coughing and Ethan not being able to sleep) by Sunday morning (today!) my contractions died down to hardly noticeable. One or two every hour. And remain about there.

Today I feel tired. In every possible sense of the word. I miss Jasper so much. My body hurts. My emotions are spent.

HOWEVER I'm so thankful that my babies (all 4 of them) are safe. That God won't ever give me more than I can handle. I'm so thankful that I have such dear friends and family that are willing to be there for me when I need them. My parents who are so committed to me. Sometimes it's hard to ask for help if that's all you feel like you are ever doing is getting help from people but you know I'm beginning to realize it's just the season I'm in. There will be a time where I'll be the one offering the helping hand.

I'm living in this promise:

"Fear not: for I am with you: do not be dismayed; for I am thy God: I will strengthen you...I will help you...I will uphold you with the right hand of my righteousness. "

Isaiah 41:10

Happy Halloween!

2009-10-31T20:09:00.000-07:00

Tear jerker

2009-10-31T08:13:00.000-07:00

So CMT's top 20 countdown was playing while I was doing dishes this morning and THIS video came on. Chandler asked me "If we go to that gate will our Daddy come too?"

As if the song doesn't make you cry enough!

This man...

2009-10-30T09:59:00.000-07:00

Loves God first above all else.
Makes his wife his second priority and loves her with a fiery passion.
Is the kind of Dad every kid wishes they had.
Is a hard worker. A provider.
Is gentle.
Cares about everyone else first.
Always gives 100% in everything he does.
He is so quick to forgive and never judges.
He has a servants heart.
He has a cute dimple and the most beautiful blue eyes with little flecks of gold in the sun.

I'm crazy about him. He has my utmost respect. He makes me a better person. I am so lucky.

I love this man.

whip lash

2009-10-22T22:23:00.000-07:00

Alright SO imagine it being THAT time of the month all. the. time. My mood swings are giving me whip lash! Good day, bad day, good day, bad day, I'm so happy, I'm so sad, I'm doing great, this sucks so much. For all the people that have to be around me or that read my status updates on FB I am so sorry in advance. A lot of the time I just want to say to people "Do you mind if we take a 6 month break too?" Like just put all my friendships and relationships on hold till Jasper got home. I don't want anyone to know me like this. I feel like such a drain. I really am a nice person to know, I promise. Maybe that's why some military people love moving around so much because they embarress themselves one place probably by a deployment or something like that and then they get to "start over" somewhere else. The thing is, I really like all my friends. I've never had so many people in my life that I really loved so much so I just kinda wanna put all of them on hold and come back when I'm not being such an emotional roller coaster.

It's midnight. I was stuck off base with three kids at 10:30pm because I forgot my dumb ID. It was a hard day, good evening, and a bad night. Too much for me. I'm going to bed. PLLLEEEASE sleep tonight little children.

I feel so blessed I could just...

2009-10-21T19:42:00.000-07:00

throw my head back and laugh...

1 week down 26 (or so) to go...

2009-10-14T19:48:00.000-07:00

It's a long one! I mean REALLY long.

Looks like I've made it through what people say is the "hardest" week of a deployment. I've come to the conclusion that there is no such thing as the "hardest" week- but that's another story and completely depends on the family I suppose.

We woke up at 3:30am on Tuesday morning of last week and with very heavy hearts we drove Jasper to the Airport. We all got our "boarding passes" (they let spouses and children of people deploying through to the gate to say goodbye) and walked him to his "big jet". It was all a rush and happened so quickly that it seemed like kind of a blur to me. He wrapped his arms around me and with all my might I tried to soak in every ounce of this "last hug". The way it felt, the way he smelled, how we fit like a perfect puzzle piece. Tears burned my cheeks and I said good bye to my best friend. Chandler handled it well and was ready to take his position as man of the house and was very brave. It was hard to watch Jasper say goodbye to Ethan knowing he'll be almost 2 when Jasper gets back. They change so much at this age. Skylar did okay saying goodbye up until Jasper turned around to walk away. Then she lost it. She could not contain her tears and cries. I'll never forget the sadness in my sweet little 3 year old's eyes. She understood what was happening far more than anyone realized she did. The night before when Jasper was putting her to bed she also started bawling and told him "I'll be late for school tomorrow if you don't get on the plane and go to work." I've felt like if there is anyone I could relate to how sad I was it was her. At 3 and at 23 girls handle their emotions the same. It's comforting to have someone-even someone so small, to share that with. We watched the plane pull away and made our way to the car. My feet felt like concrete blocks walking through the airport because as soon as we got home "it" officially started. There is so much happening while he is gone it just was too much to process. We made it home, all climbed into bed and took a nap. Skylar was the last to wake up and woke up crying again, so I ran her a bubble bath with candles (she's never had candles before so I figured it would take her mind off of it-and it worked great!) Then all of us feeling a little better we headed off to our playgroup and enjoyed a few hours with some friends. Off we went to have lunch at my Mama's. Then to my good friend's place who lives down the street (her hubby is in Afghanistan.) She had made Transformer and Hello Kitty cupcakes for the kids and gave them little gifts to keep their spirits up. What a great friend. We had some pizza our kids played and we enjoyed some laughs. Needless to say the day was very busy and distracting. We came home and I tucked everyone in bed. All with their new stuffed animals with a special personalized voice recording from Daddy. Then the house fell very quiet. Feeling like I had done well and conquered the day better than I thought I would. I sat down and read an email from Jasper that he had sent from the Airport and I really started missing him. All of a sudden out of nowhere I started sobbing like I had never sobbed before in. my. life. I couldn't explain it. For the first time (I know that sounds crazy) it hit me how long it would be before I felt him hug me. For the first time it hit me what it was going to feel like to have our baby without him by my side. The pain in my chest went straight through my back. It literally felt like I'd been stabbed. What if something happened to him while he was over there and I never saw him again? Of course he's not at war, but the last few months we've known and known of too many people passing away unexpectedly. What if something happened to one of us and he wasn't here? These were really thoughts going through my head and it was horrible. Shaking I dialed a few close friends and fortunately couldn't get a hold of anyone (they would have called 911 to hear me crying like that. :) I quickly decided I was not going to be doing this. We were going to Germany and we were going to stay with Jasper in his tiny hotel room. All six of us no questions. I hopped on expedia did a search for plane tickets and started sobbing all over again when I saw the total. By the time I could come up with that amount, no one would let a pregnant woman so far along fly! I text my friend (the one who made the cupcakes) and she reassured me that she had spent MANY nights crying till she was throwing up-convincing me that I was not the only one who has ever felt this way about their deployed spouse. :) She told me to cry my eyes out and then to go to sleep. I did just that. 2am came and I heard Jasper's voice. Over and over again. I realized it was Sky's "Daddy bear". I went to see what was going on and I found this tiny little thing curled up in a ball face soaked in tears saying she missed Daddy. I scooped her up and couldn't believe how much this was affecting her. Never under estimate what your children can understand. She spent the night in my bed of course. It's been an emotional week for her, and she says many times a day that she misses him. Chandler also talks about him a lot and says he misses him. He told me sadly "When we talk to Daddy on the phone we can't hug him" But he really has been trying to be helpful and help me. It's very sweet to see him try to take on this role. It blesses my heart so much for him to have such a great role model and to try and be like his Daddy.

Random things/things that I'm learning since:

We've been sick and there have been sleepless nights. That's very hard to do alone when you have to be up all day taking care of small children with a smile on your face. I went 22 hours without sleep one night and then only got an hour and a half when I did end up getting to sleep. I kinda lost it at that point again (feeling sick myself.)

It's been freezing and snowing! I love it! Have you ever noticed though it's so much harder to figure out what shoes to wear in the winter?

My Dog went into heat. Seriously this might make you laugh, but it's so disgusting and I didn't want to have to deal with it. EEEEEW. The vet said $400 to get her spayed!

I'm learning how much I need to rely on God for strength. What it means to put him first before my husband and before my children. Learning to look to him for my validation and not to others.

My Mommy came and did my dishes, tidied up my living room and helped me get the kids to bed (the night after the hour and a half of sleep).

And she's also brought us dinner. :) I love her so much.

We've gotten to speak to Jasper on Skype and the phone. It's so comforting.

I'm learning what it means to be Mommy and Daddy. Learning it's not a job meant for one person and to not try to be 100% of both because I only feel disappointed in myself when I can't do it.

I'm learning to be more strict at some times and a little more lenient at others.

I don't really like to go places other than my Moms. It's easier to stay in a routine.

I've felt very sad when I see pictures of births and the moments shared together as a couple during birth. It's going to be such a bitter sweet day.

I really enjoy playing with my kiddies. Far more than I enjoy doing house work. :) I really take pride in that honestly. My house will never be perfectly clean and I don't want to try be perfect.
I will enjoy the memories spent with my kids far more than I will enjoy remembering that I parked them in front of the TV or a video game but at least my dishes were done. Granted I'd love it if I could play and have a clean house but c'mon. Lets be realistic, there are only 24 hours in one day.

On top of work Jasper has taken the time in Germany to take on full time school and will be a little over a year away from his bachelors degree when he gets back. Which means soon after he will commission to an officer.

I listened to a sermon by a youth pastor at our church that completely changed my perspective on a lot of things. The key point was:

"The storms of our lives reveal what we are really made of..." "How you ride out those storms reveal how you genuinely believe and trust in Jesus..."

listen to it here. It's one of the best sermons I've heard and will probably listen to it a few more times.

I really miss my husband. We are so close with each other and this will only bring us closer. I have no doubt. Some military families unfortunately TDY's and deployments tear them apart. I'm so thankful that we have God in our lives and that we love each other so much. Sometimes I look at us and think, how lucky are we? I'm really living a fairytale with these beautiful children and this wonderful man of God.

I'm so interested to see what happens the next 6 months. I believe God is going to be doing a lot in our lives. I can already see it happening.

I know that I've written the longest blog post EVER and I doubt anyone read it all but I just couldn't find parts that I wanted to leave out. :) I'm off to bed and I'm hoping for a good nights rest. Looking forward to talking to my hubby and hoping for a great day. I hope you have a great day also! Thanks for stopping by. :)

I'm feeling...

2009-10-10T00:06:00.000-07:00

so sad.

A close call

2009-10-08T07:50:00.000-07:00

Today I'm thankful for the loop on Skylar's backpack that literally saved her life. Some guy in the school parking lot (who was going way too freaking fast) wasn't paying attention and nearly ran over my daughter. Luckily my Mommy protective reflexes kicked in and I grabbed her by the loop and had to throw her to the ground behind me in order to save her. It was so close that her jacket grazed his car. Then of course she was mad at me for throwing her but I'm okay with that. :) It saved her life. So seriously praise the Lord, it was almost a terrible day.

super powers...

2009-10-01T22:25:00.000-07:00

It's 11:30pm and I was in bed at 9:30 ready to sleep. Wish I had the "super power" as I call it, that my husband possesses to just turn off and fall asleep-in under 2 seconds like he does. That would feel amazing.

I have sooo much going on in my head right now...in my heart too.

Deployments are hard-anyone will tell you that, but being pregnant during one puts a whole 'nother twist on it, let me tell ya. Phew, I've never been this exhausted from my own emotions in. my. life. And he hasn't even left! Staying strong (in front of my children) when I feel unbelievably weak is a must. They can't "lose" both parents. So if you feel the urge, please pray for me to have strength. Pregnancy is always hard for me. No one really knows that like my husband does. He's always been my strength to push through the exhaustion etc. or just let me sleep till I feel better ;) so right now I feel like just my mad mix of emotions and the effort it takes to not show them too much to my kids/the pregnancy in itself is taking a wee toll on me. I need rest. I would like to just switch off for a few hours.

How do you switch off?

It's a wonderful life (part 2)

2009-09-28T15:26:00.000-07:00

Triple birthday bash! Ethan REALLY enjoys his cake. :) That first year just flew by.

Another birthday! This one however was a surprise little party the kids and I threw for Jasper. He won't be here to celebrate his real birthday so we did it early to get a chance to celebrate him on his special day. :) Ethan was sad that our fun evening had to come to an end. :) hehe

The Zoo! This Place just never gets old. We really enjoyed our special family day together. Time is getting shorter and shorter before Daddy has to go so we are making sure to cherish every moment with him. We are going to miss him sooooo much. He doesn't make this very easy being the best Daddy and husband in the world. :)

Part 3 coming soon! I still have to develop our water Cameras from Pirates cove and Water world. Now THOSE were some fun days! :)

It's a wonderful life (part 1)

2009-09-28T15:22:00.000-07:00

Skylar's first day of preschool! Oh how she loves it and adores her teachers. I'm so thankful that she got in this year. :) She's already learning so much. Chandler is back for his second and final year before kindergarten and was excited to show his little sister the ropes. :)

The Happy Apple Farm! If you've never been, GO! We had such an amazing day together. For sure a new family tradition to go every summer. Delicious apples, berries, pears and pumpkins you can pick your self. Not to mention the yummy lunch from the grill. The folks were so friendly, we made some great memories. :)

After the Apple farm we made an Apple pie, and enjoyed family movie night. Skylar loved wearing her "new" pajamas that were actually mine when I was a little girl. Of course my silly boys would throw popcorn every where and wear the tubs as hats. :) They bring me so much joy.

The Balloon Glow! We had a blast seeing the balloons light up the Sky. Unfortunately we couldn't make it back in the morning to watch them take off over the lake, the kiddos were feeling quite under the weather. Maybe next year!

Chandler donates to Skylar

2009-09-18T13:42:00.000-07:00

So like I had said before, we went through our entire house and deep cleaned and declutterd all the rooms. Including the kids toys. We donated about half of what they owned simply because they weren't playing with it and it was just taking up too much space.

Here's a conversation I had with Chandler today:

Me: "Chandler, go clean your room because when Daddy gets home he has a big surprise for us as long as the house is clean" (I know, I know, I bribe.) :-)

Chandler: "I don't waaaaant to, it's too much work. You do it and tell Daddy that I did it and I won't tell him you lied."

Me: Trying to hide my laughter "No Chandler, we don't lie. You have to go clean your room or I'll have to tell Daddy to leave your surprise at work."

Chandler: "Okay fine, but I'm mad because you make me work too hard."

Me: Again trying not to laugh "Well Chandler, working is just a part of life"

10 minutes later

Chandler: "Mommy, I'm done!"

Me: "Really Chandler?! That was super fast!"

Chandler: "Yeah, I just donated all my toys to Skylar since she doesn't have as many as me."

I go upstairs to find he had taken everything that was laying all over his floor and "donated" it onto Skylar's room's floor rather than putting it away in it's designated tub. :)

That kid just cracks me up.

Blessed

2009-09-14T07:36:00.000-07:00

I checked the mail this morning (I hadn't checked it all weekend) on my way home from dropping the kids off at school. In it I found a sweet card from someone anonymous, with a much needed blessing. My heart feels so full. I'm so amazed by the grace of God. He has NEVER failed to take care of us when we are in need. I'm not afraid of the months to come because he always shows us in little ways (and big!) that he is taking care of us. :) I gotta say it again, my heart feels so full. It makes me wanna sing!

"I've got the joy, joy, joy, joy down in my heart!

Where?!

Down

in

my

heart!

Where?!

Down

in

my

heart to staaaaaay!"

Thank you, to who ever you are for your prayers, kindness, and generosity. I pray that you are blessed ten fold. :)

updates

2009-09-09T07:01:00.000-07:00

1. We officially have our first cold of the season. I'm not looking forward to the year with two in preschool, a toddler and a newborn baby. The combination makes me terribly nervous. Would it be a bit much to send my kids to school in latex gloves and masks? hehe We'll do what we can, drinking lots of water, vitamins, minerals, probiotics, and of course the excessive hand washing.
Hopefully it will be an easy year!

2. I've been thinking a lot about Jasper leaving. It's approaching soon. I've been thinking a lot about how hard this is going to be for ME and the kids but not really too much about how hard it's going to be for him. Selfish! He'll be missing all the holidays. :( Thinking of him spending Christmas alone breaks my heart. Missing birthdays, not being here to snuggle his tiny newborn. When he leaves, he leaves his (big) pregnant wife :) and three children living on an AF base. When he comes home, he comes home to a new house that he prob only saw in pictures, a hot, skinny wife...okay maybe that's a stretch...hehe we'll go with not pregnant wife :) and 4 kids! I can't imagine what that would feel like. Coming home to so much change. We only have to hurt and miss ONE person. He'll have the hurt of missing FIVE! The thought of all this makes me so sad. Often the military wives get all the credit for taking on the hard stuff but I think some of the credit is elsewhere due. SO I'm going to do my best to make this easy for everyone. Me complaining about how hard it is to Jasper in a different country is only going to make things harder for him. So I'm going to remind myself of the things to be thankful for:

* It's only 6-8 months- in the Army it can be 18 months!

* My husband will be fighting the war on terror from the safety of Germany (he'll be tracking missiles in the middle east-and that's about all I'm really allowed to know). I won't have to worry about his safety like my good friend does about her hubby. The only thing I have to worry about is if he'll get food poisoning from the schnitzel ! :)

* MOST deployments don't come with a big tax free bonus. We'll be debt free by spring and be able to buy Jasper a car (he's had his clunker since he was a teenager and it's seen a lot of abuse!) without having to take out a loan.

* We'll get to skype!

* He might miss the birth of our son BUT he gets to come home. All to many wives have seen their husbands leave while carrying babies in their bellies and they NEVER return.

* He gets to miss my uh, post par tum hormones! :) You know the ones where you break down and start bawling because a button fell off your shirt or sit on the kitchen floor and cry because you ran out of milk. Like the whole world IS GOING TO END because you didn't get to shower. Yeah, those hormones. :) hehe it's funny to laugh about now but MAN that stuff always hits me hard and I'm glad he won't be around to witness it-that stuff is always embarrassing after you have leveled out. I'll have to save my moments for when the kids are in bed or at school- so I don't totally freak them out. :)

Anyway jokes aside. This is going to be hard for him, for me, and for my kids. BUT when we have so much to be thankful for there is a lot to stay positive about. I'll have a lot of extra time by myself at night, what better than to use this time to grow closer to the Lord? I'm looking forward to see myself remain positive through this.

"but those who hope in the LORD
will renew their strength.
They will soar on wings like eagles;
they will run and not grow weary,
they will walk and not be faint."

Isaiah 40:31

3. Our small group has started it's fall semester and I can't tell you how much I love these people. They are like my family and I would do anything for any of them! We've made such good relationships and I hope to know them for many, many, years to come. We are doing a book together. Love & Respect. I've been wanting to read this for a while! Jasper is going to be doing it from Germany. Maybe we'll skype him in a time or two. :)

4. We've been working our tails off decluttering our house. We've donated EIGHT van fulls (with the seats all taken out I might add) of stuff that was cluttering our home. That's a lot of stuff! We've organized things in tubs and utilized our space so much more. It looks good around here! I wish we had done it sooner!

5. It's getting hard to carry Ethan on my hip considering I have a big belly in the way. He's now started taking seat on my bump. I remember this when I was preggo with Skylar. Chan would sit on the bump when I carried him. :) hehe I kinda wish we got pregnant 2 months earlier. It would be fun to have two sets 14 months apart. But I guess it's close enough. First two are 14 months apart then 2 years and 5 months and then the next two will be 16 months apart. I swear having Chan and Sky so close kinda feels like they are twins now that they are older. People actually ask me that all the time. :) I'm SO happy to be having another baby. :) Four seems so perfect for us. :) Till we adopt anyway ;)

That's about all for now. I'm going to take some Tylenol for the head and go spend some time with my babies for the heart. :)

Oh I have plenty of fun pictures to share soon!

Quick update/ announcements

2009-08-24T07:51:00.000-07:00

There were pictures I wanted to put up and I wanted to show you the ultra sound of our sweet little new baby but our other computer is not so much working right now. Jasper saved it before I lost all my pictures (PHEW) and got the parts to fix it sometime this week. So no pictures for now while I use the lap top.

Announcement number 1, most of you already know but we are having a baby boy!!! His ultra sound pics are so cute, it actually looks like he has chubby cheeks! He crosses his legs just like Ethan does. It's too funny. Since Ethan was born he sleeps, sits, sits in his car seat, anywhere anyhow he always crosses his legs. In the ultra sound we have a pic of the baby with his legs crossed. :) We have decided to name him Dawson Brooks Platt. We are really excited about the name. We love it. The best part? We have to fill out some legal documents now before Jasper leaves (next announcement) naming our children so his name will not change. :) It's official. We will have our selves a little Dawson. It was a tough call it was either going to be Brooks Dawson or the other way. :) Dawson Brooks it is. I like typing it can't you tell? :)

BIG ANNOUNCEMENT #2 we found out a while ago but I had to sort out my feelings about it before I said anything. Jasper will be going to Germany for sure. He leaves the first week in September (not sure of the dates..maybe we'll find out today. We are hoping after labor day weekend) for 3 weeks for training, then he'll be home for a week (he'll have to work some) and then he goes to Germany for 6 or more months (sometimes it's 8). Yes he'll miss the birth, no he can't come back for it. I didn't think that this would bug me as much as it does. Don't get me wrong I knew it would bug me but I didn't think it would feel like this. I'm REALLY scared. I thought before, it's my 4th I know what I'm doing I can handle it. Not so much. Now I'm more nervous than I was before I had my first child. I'll have my Mom in the delivery room as usual (and I'm so thankful she'll be there) but obviously a husband brings a different kind of comfort. Plus the nurses always compliment him for being such a good coach. ;) I plan to get induced, so unless I go before at least I'll be a little prepared and Jasper can get the day off in Germany and we are going to try Skype him in! I love technology! Of course it will be at a non-weird angle, for those of you wondering. ;) Like by my face. :) Anyway enough about the birth, I'll talk more about that later. Right now we have A LOT of things to take care of before he leaves. I may have to move while he is gone since they are tearing down our houses on base so we are trying to declutter our entire house before he goes so I won't have to deal with it by myself. We are nervous about how the kids are going to take the news. I don't want them to be sad. It's the hardest part of it all I think. At least they'll be able to see him through Skype. We are also going to video tape Jasper reading a hundred books so they can watch him read bed time stories at night. :) We'll do our best to keep them "involved" with him. As hard as it's all going to be, it's what we have been praying for. This trip will take us 100% out of debt with the extra pay. Only thing we'll owe is on our van and that's it! We have really been struggling, sometimes even running out of food (thank goodness for my parents, they've really been there for us when we've been in need). So such a big burden will be lifted from us and we are really looking forward to financial freedom. We've made so many mistakes and learned so much about being good stewards of our money now, so as hard as it's been we are thankful for lessons learned. Anyway, more to come on the trip. I'll keep you updated.

update: Our Puppy contracted the deadly disease Parvo and we had to give up rights to him so Pets Mart could treat him. The bill was going to run prob $2,000. They can't tell us if he survived or not but if he did then once he is healthy they will adopt him out. Another reason it will be nice to be out of debt, so we'll be able to afford these kinds of emergencies. Our other dog got tested for Parvo and it came out negative (there was an incubation period so she may have been positive it just didn't show) but now she's really sick and we are doing everything to take care of her. The test will be useless now that she just had the Parvo vaccine it will come up positive even if she doesn't have it. We are watching her closely, giving her silver and keeping her hydrated, and giving her probiotics. If she DOES end up having it we WILL find a way to pay whatever we have to for her. We've had her for nearly two years. She's part of our family. So keep her in your prayers please! She's not just a dog, she's so important to us all and not something we need to be dealing with right now.

Sorry this was so long! Sorry if I bored you! Keep us in your prayers, we have a lot on our plate right now! :) Alrighty...time to get to work!

P.S. Sorry if spelling and grammer is a mess! I don't have time to go through this. ;) You'll get the gist I'm sure. :)

Happy Birthday Ethan!

2009-08-15T19:42:00.000-07:00

Ethan Joshua

1 year old

28 inches

23.1 pounds

Strawberry blond hair

Blue Eyes

His favorite foods are cheese and Cheetos.
He has mastered walking and is now learning to run...away. :)
He can wave, clap, and say hi.
He still loves sleeping in his swing.
He absolutely ADORES his big brother.
He likes to pull his sister's hair.
He laughs and reaches up for Daddy when he gets home from work.
He loves to play in the water-including swishing the toilet water when no one is looking.
He sucks a Binky and will continue to do so till probably around the age of 3. :)
He is very possessive about HIS toys.
He has uncanny sense for knowing when the stairs aren't gated and darts for them.
He loves trucks and puppies.
He hates avocados.
He finds Mama when he has owies.
He loves to "sing" with his sister in the car.
When he's excited he says "ooooo-oooooo" (pictured above) :)
He shares a room with his big brother and they stay up and goof off at bed time.
He is very ticklish.
He doesn't care for books or TV.
He can stack 3 blocks.
He gets sick the easiest out of everyone in the family.
He is not a cuddler EXCEPT for with his Grandma.
He's good at unloading the dishwasher...onto the floor.
He jumps in his crib.
Feeds the dogs his food.
Brings us all so much joy.

Happy birthday sweet boy. You fill up our lives with so much joy. We are so thankful for you and pray that you become the strong man of God we know you are meant to be. May you have many more years and may they be filled with the joy of the Lord. We love you so much!

Can you believe it's already been a year?

WA-HOO!!!

2009-07-30T18:37:00.000-07:00

I was fretting over the costs the new baby was going to bring. With Ethan, I figured I'd be able to do with out a lot of the stuff we got rid of after having Sky. It was not easy, and I wish I would have tried harder to find some of these items. So this time around I've made myself a list of the things that would make life MUCH easier and came up with a total that made me want to CRY! Feeling bummed, I thought I'd stroll onto Craigs List to see what I could find. I had to blink a few times to make sure I was seeing the correct listed price for THIS item. Who in their right mind would sell it for that cheap!? It must be broken, I thought. I quickly typed up an email and luckily the item had not been sold. I made a trip to their house to find it not only working but in LIKE NEW condition! Ready for how much I paid? READY?! $25!!!! AHHH! I'm so thrilled!!! Such an answerd prayer!

I'm off to hunt down some more bargins! :)

The cutest thing!

2009-07-28T20:11:00.001-07:00

See more funny videos and funny pictures at CollegeHumor.

This is SO CUTE!!!!

It's done!

2009-07-27T06:32:00.000-07:00

www.IreneJoyPhotography.com

A BIG thank you to my INCREDIBLE and WONDERFUL husband for all his hard work on it. I love you so much honey!

Whats up around here...

2009-06-18T06:24:00.000-07:00

1. Skylar got her very first hair cut. We thought we'd make a little tradition and get her hair cut at the same place we took Chan for his first. She kept telling the lady "Just a little bit" which ended up being about 3 inches, but it's still super long and looks nice and healthy. She had fun watching a Barbie princess movie and getting sparkles sprinkled in her hair. She's such a girly girl. I love it.

Before

(that's her "don't bug me I'm watching a princess movie face)

After

2. Speaking of Sky, she started her first Ballet and tap dancing class. Seriously my heart melted watching her prance around in her ity-bitty ballet shoes with her hair pulled neatly into a bun. She would constantly check to see if I was watching her. Indeed I was and my heart swelling with pride every second. I love how much one on one time they had with the teacher. I really think she learned a lot! How lucky am I to have a daughter? Especially a special little girl like her... She came home and showed her Daddy all of her new moves and let me tell ya it was tear jerking. Don't you just love when you have those moments? :)

3. I get to go see the little baby in my tummy on Friday. Yay! A friend of mine is due 4 days before me and she showed me her pictures and I just couldn't believe it! I've only ever gotten an Ultra sound at the beginning and around 20 weeks and then at the end so I never got to see how extremely developed they look at 12 weeks or 13? I dunno ( I just can't keep up with the number, I guess by your fourth one you are like "I'm somewhere in my second trimester or something" ) They have little noses, little lips and hands and feet and it's just SO CUTE! Still can't believe I'm going to be a Mommy of four! I just love the idea of a big family and it's quickly becoming more than an idea and more like a reality!

Speaking of the little baby, I have exciting news (exciting to me anyway.) I switched my insurance-same provider, I just get so see civilian doctors and have a few very minimal co-pays. YAY! I'm going to see the first Doctor who delivered Chandler. He's a great guy and he goes to New Life. I also get to deliver at The new St. Francis hotel suite- I mean incredible new maternity ward. That has been my favorite part of having babies-well you know other than HAVING and meeting my new baby. I love checking into a nice room and not thinking about my house, being able to order off a menu whatever I want and it being brought to me (I just love hospital and airplane food-don't know why just do), my other kids being taken care of by Grandma. I just get to sleep, and be with my hubby and new baby for 2 days. Just us- in a nice hotel suite. I wish I had pictures. It looks amazing!

4. MY HUBBY GOT PROMOTED!!! He went from Airman First Class to Senior Airman. WHOO-HOO! I'm so so proud of him. We threw a little BBQ for him with a few of his co-workers and our families and fun was had by all. Congrats honey, I'm so so proud of you!

5. The big kids are in Vacation Bible School from 10-1 every day this week and let me tell ya it's been like a little vacation for me. Going grocery shopping with ONE KID! I never realized it was possible to actually buy all the things on my list without being distracted and forgetting half of it. :) That and it's so quite in the house...

6. I feel like I never get to see my friends anymore! :( This makes me sad. I feel like I'm so busy with everything all the time and then I think to myself what exactly am I so busy with that's not letting me hang out with friends. Oy! So if I haven't seen you in a while, lets hang out! Picnic, stroll in the park, whatever!

Okay that's all for now! :) What's new with you?

What do you have in your tummy?

2009-06-10T14:26:00.000-07:00

Skylar: "Mommy, you got a baby in your tummy?"

Me: "I sure do!"

Skylar: "It might be a baby girl or it might be a baby boy."

Me: "That's right honey, we don't know yet."

Chandler: "It might be a baby Transformer."

Me: Laughing too hard to speak.

Wordless Wednesday

2009-06-10T07:47:00.000-07:00

A perfect date.

2009-06-03T15:14:00.000-07:00

Today started out with Jasper doing Skylar's hair and they were talking about going to a ball. She looked so beautiful in her dress I thought that we just had to take her out so she can walk around feeling pretty for all to see. We all spontaneously dressed up and headed to Olive Garden with our gift card that had been begging us to use it. It was the perfect date with my favorite people in the world.

Mommy & Daddy. Courtesy of Chandler Bing who almost dropped my camera in his pasta. :)

We of course had to end the date with some yummy ice-cream!

If only...

2009-05-31T11:56:00.000-07:00

I need a guilt free day (and night) off at a nice hotel while someone cleans my house to perfection standards and someone else plays with my kids non-stop for a full day so I don't have to feel guilty for abandoning them.

Sigh... I can dream can't I?

A memorial service that challenged my faith

2009-05-29T19:06:00.000-07:00

I went to bed last night after spending some time loving on sweet Isabella's parents and for the first time in my life I wondered if God had made a mistake.

Michelle, her Mommy, is the happiest person you will ever meet and trust me when I say I am NOT exaggerating. One hour with her and you'll be exhausted! :) She is pure energy, spirit, and truly lights up a room.

Mike, the most lovable and gentle father that I have ever seen, loves his kids with incredible zeal and passion.

These guys love each other like life is a fairy tale.

Why would God let a nightmare tear into this family?

Isabella was allergic to 30+ foods. Her Mom joked about if you ever had to bake a cake without flour, eggs, yeast & sugar then you would know these little experiments didn't always turn out. However while everyone else enjoyed their "normal" food Isabella would make sure that EVERYONE knew that what she was eating was the most delicious thing she had ever tasted in her life. :)

Isabella also struggled with asthma. Because of this, this precious girl couldn't take another life giving breath. She took her first breath in her home and her last there as well. Hard to read isn't it?

I wondered why couldn't God just let her breathe!? He had complete control, why didn't he just let her live?

I felt angry. At God.

During the service today as beautiful pictures were displayed, people were weeping uncontrollably, probably sharing some of my feelings. I wept. My husband wept like I had never seen before.

This was so unfair.

During a segment of worship as I wiped my blurry eyes I noticed no one in the room had their hands raised.

Except her.

The woman who had just lost her baby.

Was worshiping GOD.

With all of what was left of her strength.

Sobbing at this sight I told God that I trusted him, and that I knew he made no mistake. As I lifted my hand to the chorus it felt like I was pushing 500 pounds. Satan was trying to harden my heart. I pushed.

"Everlasting, your light will shine when all else fails..."

"the cry of my heart is to bring you praise
from the inside out Lord, my soul cries out"

I worshiped God.

I trusted that he had made no mistake even though I could not understand.

Isabella's sweet Mommy releasing balloons for her little girl.

Isabella Sophia Zink
1/20/2004 - 5/23/2009

Health update

2009-05-28T12:53:00.001-07:00

Okay I am not NEARLY as bad as this. I'd say I average a 20oz Coke every other day. This one pregnant lady drank 7 LITERS of coke a day!! That should be child abuse! Sheez. Anyway.

Quick update on my "health status". I've been taking my prenatals, fish oil, iron, magnesium, and DHA supplements (for the babe within). I've been setting a timer during the day to go off ever 90 minutes and then I chug a glass of water. Which has lead to two things: 1. Twenty times as many trips to the bathroom. 2. Feeling quite a decent amount less achy! I don't know why I'm so shocked. One person comented that "water is to the body as God is to the heart" must be true! :)

I've had an increase in headaches and not too much difference in sleep stuff, but an improvement is an improvement, and I am thrilled. Still a lot I have to learn and "fix" about my health but I think I'm headed in the right direction. :)

I also made an appointment to get reffered to be tested for food and other allergies I may have. Interested to see what comes of that.

Now it's time for a nice cold glass of coke...I mean water! WATER! ;)

Sweet little Isabella

2009-05-27T12:18:00.000-07:00

Sweet Isabella, next to Skylar on the right.

I've rewritten this about four times. I just don't know how to express what I'm feeling. Isabella the sweetest little girl in Chandler's preschool class passed away unexpectedly this Saturday.

I didn't know how to explain to the kids-or whether I should even tell them. After I spoke to Chandler about it again today he asked me "Is her Mommy sad?" I can't even imagine how sad her Mommy must be, or her Daddy who stayed at home with them. I just can't imagine. I also just can't understand why things like this happen to families like this one. Humble and always caring about every one else first.

Please pray for comfort for this family that is going through this terrible time. Read what they have to say by clicking here.

A diagnosis or a divine challenge?

2009-05-20T06:26:00.000-07:00

Years on end I haven't been feeling well to put it simply. Probably since I moved out of my Mom's house and "grew up." She's really the best Mom ever and took such good care of me. I've had stomach issues, migraines and headaches, muscle pain, joint pain, and sleeping issues (though that one stems back to when I was a kid. Some people start sleeping through the night at a mere 6 weeks old. I'm a 1165 weeks old and I STILL don't sleep through the night. :)

Lately some of these things like muscle pain and sleeping have been, to say the least, excruciating. I've missed so many important things, my kids have been affected by this, my husband, my family. I hate it.

Job 7:3-4

"So I have been allotted months of futility, and nights of misery have been assigned to me.When I lie down I think, 'How long before I get up? The night drags on, and I toss till dawn."

I finally sucked it up and went to the doctor this week (I'm not a fan of trips to the doctor.) The doctor thinks I may have fibromyalgia. Something that's come up many times when I've done symptom searches. She ordered some labs and they took about half my blood ;) to rule out other things. After discussing it with her I became very discouraged yesterday because there is really not much you can do for it when you are pregnant. I thought to myself, I can't live like this for my entire pregnancy and for however long I decide to nurse. I did a lot of research yesterday and honestly the symptoms are fairly accurate. People are diagnosed with fibromyalgia when the doctors can't find anything else wrong. It's a really strange "disease." Many people in fact don't believe in it or think it's psychological. I think people have psychological issues that can most certainly effect their bodies. Do I think everyone that has pain issues has psychological issues? Of course not. Diseases are very real in our sin filled world. I've never been one of those people that just nod their head and do what the Doctor says. I like to research things and figure it out for myself as well. All the material we need is out there in this day and age we do not have to be ignorant.

One thing I read I found to be the most interesting of all:

Lamentations 1: 12-13

“Does it mean nothing to you, all you who pass by? Look around and see if there is any suffering like mine, which the Lord brought on me when he erupted in fierce anger. He has sent fire from heaven that burns in my bones."

Now I'm not saying I'm suffering like Jeremiah did BUT I found this verse so interesting.

Could it be that God is angry with me for not taking care of his temple?

1 Corinthians 6:19

"Don’t you realize that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit, who lives in you and was given to you by God? You do not belong to yourself"

Look, health and wellness is not my forte. I'm interested in it but I'm not good at it. I like eating cold pizza for breakfast versus almond butter on whole wheat bread. And in ALL honesty I go MANY days without drinking one single sip of water. I like Coke. And sugary Gatorade. Don't judge me now, I am being honest and open here. You see, I think this in itself is a sin. My body does not belong to me, it belongs to God. Has he cast "fire to my bones" to help me see that I'm slowly destroying what belongs to him?

My attempt to become a marathon runner miserably failed. I could not do it. If your car ran out of oil and you drove anyway you would destroy your engine. Well I think that's where I'm at. I don't take my vitamins, I don't eat healthy, and I don't exercise enough. I don't think at this point I have the energy to go do kick boxing but I can certainly start with something like Yoga in the mornings along with a healthy breakfast. My car needs maintenance work. ;)

A friend of mine had a 2 year old that was diagnosed with Autism and she worked incredibly hard on his diet and three years later that has virtually disappeared. Do I believe the same for me? Certainly. So I can't say whether I have fibromyalgia or not but I know a lot of my health issues can be resolved with a life style change. I'm really not sure how to do it or where to start especially in our tight financial situation but I'm going to try and take baby steps. I know it's going to start with repentance and prayer and I know God will make a way.

Have you ever been told by a Doctor that something was wrong and you overcame it?

Thanks for taking time to read, I love hearing your thoughts.

Monday, Monday!

2009-05-18T12:38:00.000-07:00

1. Once again it's Monday. I have NOT been feeling well. I haven't been sleeping due to some insomnia. Plain and simple, it sucks. I've been a bad sleeper since I was a little kid. I remember waking up in the middle of the night when I was 8 or so and just cleaning my room for three hours because I couldn't fall back asleep. It's horrible. I can handle one or two nights of little to no sleep but when it goes on for weeks I feel a bit like I'm going to lose it. My whole body aches. On a pain scale from 0-10 I'd say some nights it's like an 8 and I'm curled up in bed crying. It feels like the achiness (Sp?!) you get from the flu. So pray for me please!

2. Ethan has 2 little teeth and it's so darn cute. He's our earliest for teeth. The big kids got them around 12 months.

3. I had a fun photo shoot with the Jones family who welcomed their new baby Lillian a few weeks ago. I'm loving the pictures and am convinced that Rachel should be a model. :) I am also convinced that Jasper should be my business partner. :) We work so well together. He has a great eye for lighting, he's got a great eye for pictures himself, and we communicate so well with each other, I can't imagine working with someone else! He could be my second shooter, my assistant, equipment manager, we have an awesome new vision. :) These guys (my most favorite photographers EVER) did one of my best friends wedding and they are married as well. I love it!

4. I have a couple posts in the works. I want to show off my cute Mothers day gifts, my awesome day at the lake with some friends, Chandler's first field trip (the picture above) and a sneak peak of the Jones pictures. I just have to at least get some laundry done before I work on those. :)

5. I CAN'T WAIT till we move next year. They are tearing down our houses and we are going to move off base. Hoping to buy a house on the North end of town. Or maybe somewhere like black forest with some land. This will all only be possible if Jasper's TDY to Germany works out. So for that we are also praying that plans for that DON'T change. I think in September it gets "written in stone" so to speak.

6. I can't believe we are going to have FOUR kids by the end of the year! I mean WOW! I absolutely LOVE being a Mommy. I love that we had our kids so young. We had to overcome some obstacles but we did it and It was definitely worth it. I was thinking that by my 30th birthday I will have 12 year old, 11 year old, 9 year old, an almost 8 year old, and most likely by then 2 adopted siblings in the same age range. That's AWESOME! I always imagined having a big family and am loving watching it come true. Can you imagine how much fun Disney World will be then?! :) I'm just so happy. Not even my full sink of dishes or the chip crumbs on the carpet can get me down. :)

Well that's all for now folks! :)

Married to Superman

2009-05-14T06:20:00.000-07:00

I'm pretty sure I married Superman. I have full confidence and have seen with my own eyes that my cute sometimes nerdy husband can do ANYTHING. Now to a lot of people this would sound like a dream come true, and it is. However, it's so very challenging to me because unfortunately I wasn't gifted with super powers. My Superman never runs out of motivation, energy, or will power. I certainly do. For instance last night he conquered the satellite world most of which he did I'll never know because it is classified (much like Superman's work, no one ever knew that it was Clark that did those amazing things.) Then he came home cooked us all dinner, put the kids to bed, and then cleaned the house. I went to bed at 7 because my normal human body crashed. Nights like this are not unusual.

Superman's love for me is unconditional.

"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres."
1 Corinthians 13:1-8

These things do not come easy for me. Not because Superman is hard to love but because I have a selfish sin nature and I'm constantly fighting it off. I'm constantly having to put my heart in check and tell myself to be patient or kind when I'm not understood, etc. For him though it's a rare occasion that he snaps at me or is unkind. THIS makes it hard to be married to Superman. It challenges me to my core. How can he ALWAYS be so amazing? Can't he just mess up ONCE? It would make me feel so much better about myself! :) I'm thankful that I'm married to a man that makes me a better person, who loves me so deeply despite my countless flaws. I mean if I married a Superhero who better than Superman right? What if I had married the Hulk?!

Any super heroes in your life?

Wordless Wednesday

2009-05-13T08:03:00.000-07:00

Really?!

2009-05-11T15:55:00.000-07:00

My hubby just announced that he'll get to go to California for a week and watch them launch a satellite. So for one day he gets to watch an awesome launch and then for six days hang out in a hotel in SoCal. REALLY?! Seriously honey I'm SOOOOO happy for you. ;) Okay I'm a little Jealous. I'm sure one day I'll get the chance to watch them launch a satellite and relax in a hotel for a week fully paid and accommodated by the Air Force. NOT! :) hehe I'm being too sarcastic now. I really am happy that he gets to experience these things (no sarcasm this time) and happy he gets to see the world. Oneday when the kids are grown I'll get to be by his side or he can follow me to Africa when I go take pictures of African tribes. ;)

Monday updates...on Wednesday. :)

2009-05-06T08:21:00.000-07:00

1. Last week Chandler started feeling sick and had a fever, then Ethan got a fever. I thought maybe they were ear infections and coincidentally they both got one, because they really had no other symptoms. Then BAM! Runny noses, coughs, high fevers again. No ear infection. More flu like than anything. Chan feels better, Ethan is still pretty miserable, Skylar is miserable and I feel terrible. I HATE colds and always seem to get plagued with them when I'm pregnant. Right when there isn't much to take. There's nothing like good ole' NyQuil really and it just sits there in the cabinet, unused. Sigh...

2. Pregnancy wise I haven't been feeling too bad. Really tired, a little morning sickness (at any time of the day) but even that isn't too bad either. I never had morning sickness at all with the boys and with Skylar it was pretty extreme. So symptom wise I'm not sure what to think of this one as far as the what the sex is. I knew right away with the others if they were boys or girls. I even trusted my instincts so much that with each of them I was buying mass amounts of pink or blue even before the ultrasound confirmed it for me. THIS one however I have no idea. I'd like another girl. Two boys and two girls sounds perfect. Then again I think I'd like it if Skylar had 3 brothers to look out for her. :) We'll see. I'm so excited.

OH! Names! I like Ashtyn, Adalyn, or Alivia for a girl and for a boy I like Noah or Logan. I REEEALLY like Noah. Maybe Noah Logan? Naming babies is like my favorite thing EVER! I found one of my old spy books (like a journal) from when I was 13 and Skylar Mackenzie was what I wanted to name my girl one day. :) But Skylar Maria meant a whole lot more to me because Maria is my mothers middle name. :) Just thought it was neat to find.

3. School gets out on the 21st! WHOO-HOO!! I am SO excited not to have to get everyone out of the house by 7:45 everyday.

4. We sold our old (new) couches for $150! They were just taking up room in our garage and now we have money to sod the back yard! So excited for baby pools and Popsicles with STICKY FINGERS, sprinklers, slip and slides. Yay for summer!

I'm kinda rambling aren't I? Have a great rest of the week! ;)

SURPRISE!!!

2009-05-04T12:29:00.000-07:00

Due December 29th 2009. On Chandler's Birthday. :)
We are SO excited!

Yet another one about him. <3

2009-04-30T15:22:00.000-07:00

"These Airmen are literally on the picket lines for the country, They aren't only helping win our current wars; they also work every day to prevent attacks against our nation through the systems deterrent capabilities." -Chief Master Sgt. Richard Small

Read this article with my hubby in it here. This actually explains what my husband does. I'm not always very good at explaining it. :)

I beam with pride when I think about him and all that he does.

Isn't he awesome?! Oh and doesn't he look cute in that picture?

Pictures

2009-04-29T06:10:00.000-07:00

I posted some of my pictures that I took this year here. Let me know what you think! I seriously need kids other than my own to take pictures of before I launch a website, so if you've been wanting some family portraits I'll do them for no cost before I "launch" and you'll be doing me a big favor! :)

Monday updates :)

2009-04-27T07:34:00.000-07:00

1. Monday, Monday, Monday. My morning started out late today because we went to bed a bit later than usual last night and MY KIDS SLEPT IN till 6:38 and Ethan 7:15. Seriously AWESOME! SO we were inevitably late for school. When I pulled up to the drop off in front of the building my friend Mike (he's a stay at home Dad of 4-who is ALWAYS late) :) was walking back to his van and offered to stay with Ethan & Sky rather than me dragging all of them in S-L-O-W-L-Y. I thanked him and told him he could sit in the van because it was snowing. WELL on Friday we had a banquet

and I was wearing a TERRIBLY uncomfortable strapless bra that I took off in the car after we headed home from picking up the kids and left on the floor of the front passenger seat. Where he sat. UH AWKWARD. Now he probably thinks we are freaks after seeing that. I mean really, 6 hours in a bra you hate. Enough is enough. Sigh...

2. Normally I AM NOT THRILLED with snow at the end of April. But today wasn't cold and it had that beautiful fresh smell and the air felt damp and refreshing against your skin. I love those kind of days. My little flowers looked especially beautiful with a light snow giving them a nice cool drink.

3. About 6 weeks or so ago my foot started REEEEALLY hurting while I was running. I ignored it for about two weeks thinking I probably just pulled something. WELL then I tripped over my vacuum and the pain became unbearable when I walked. SO I went to the Doc and it turns out I had a stress fracture that can be caused by a lot of running. ( I can still only do 6 miles straight and the half marathon was THIS month. Uugh. It's hard!) ANYWAY she told me it would take 6-8 weeks to heal if I wore this:

4. Or I didn't have to wear it and it would take much longer and the risk of further injuring it was possible. WELL she never mentioned that by wearing it I would rip my jeans by pulling it over the boot, crush some beloved toys under it, have ALL THREE of my kids bang their heads on it at some point or another, nearly kill my Dog with it, have to readjust my seat every time I drive so I can fit in my van, completely throw my alignment off because I have this boot on one side of my body and a 20 baby in a 20 pound car seat in the other. SO needless to say I have not been wearing it. Since Easter. And my foot still hurts. BOO.

5. My hubby helped my brother in law pack the remainder of his stuff yesterday morning and then we all hugged him good bye. He has been stationed in North Carolina. It's sad when your family leaves but I really hope that it's good for him there and that he'll be really happy.

6. On the other hand my other brother & sister in law moved back here with my 3 SWEET nephews. She's going to stay here for a year while he is in Korea and then most likely they'll get stationed here for 4 more years. Yay! They were over last night and played with some sparklers. Much fun was had. :) Those KIDS ARE SO. DARN. CUTE!! I'm still trying to get Memphis the 20 month old to like me. I'll have to give him Mountain Dew behind his Mom's back. I hear he loves that. :)

7. I'm SUPER excited about some Weddings I'm going to do with Meg in May and June. She's amazing. Her pics are amazing. And I'm super privileged to be working for such an amazing photographer. Which you should vote for her as best Photographer HERE. Go vote. Right Now. You can come back and read this in a minute.

8. I gotta say. I'm REALLY loving being a Mommy. I know I've done it for 4 1/2 years and 3 children, but everyday it just keeps getting better. I love how much my kids love each other. It's just so beautiful. I'm so thankful for this life I've been given. My cup certainly runeth over. :)

HAVE A BEAUTIFUL WEEK!

Oh and Sara tagged me. I read the post on Sunday morning and took the picture right away then but didn't get around till posting it till now. I was getting ready and my hair is wet soooo I look weird but whatev. :) SO here are the rules, I tag you and you take a picture of yourself right then and there post it, and tag someone else! Let me know when you do it so I can see how pretty you are! :) SARAH ONO, SARAH DALE, ASHLEY, DANIELLE aaaand JOANNA. C'mon you guys just do it! ;)

Family forever. No matter what.

2009-04-25T21:08:00.000-07:00

You know when you do something you really regret and it crushes you to the core? Where you close your eyes so tight and wish that just this one time you could go back and fix it. Then you open your eyes and reality is still there staring right back at you. You have to remind your self to breathe because you feel so miserable about the things you've said or the things you've done or didn't do. I'll be the first to admit it. I could be a much better human. I have a list of people who would probably tell you the same about me. I royally screw up on a regular basis. The nice thing is that when you do/say these horrible things to your family, the people you love the most, they will always forgive you. You have to gather the courage to look them in the eye again and try as hard as you can not to hurt them again. Which you probably will at some point or another because you are an imperfect human. They will also probably hurt you at some point or another and you have to forgive them as well. It's just life. I can regret or I can try harder. I chose to try harder and always make things right. I love my family so very much which is why it hurts so much when things go wrong. I guess that's a good sign. If it didn't hurt that's when I should be worried right? So here I pledge to try harder and to love more. To forgive myself and to give forgiveness.

Dreaming of the future

2009-04-24T08:03:00.001-07:00

Click here and check out her header. This is what I hope my family looks like one day.

Wordless Wednesday. A sneak peek.

2009-04-22T13:45:00.000-07:00

A sneak peek from what's to come on my website... :)

United States Air Force

2009-04-22T07:37:00.000-07:00

SO I couldn't be more proud. Check out this video it's a tribute to the United States Air Force and my hubby is in it!It goes out to every one in the whole Air Force! He's right around the part where the sirens go off. It's real quick but I'm still so proud to think he's a part of something so great. :)

We are trying to plan our 4th baby :) around some of his work. He leaves for Germany in January for 6 months and then he'll be home for 9 months then leave for Greenland for a year. Which makes timing kind of a challenge. As I was telling this to someone they asked me if I thought it was worth it. Defiantly. I'm so proud to watch that video and know my family is a part of that. I'm so proud of my husband. I'm so proud of my brother in-law who is about to leave his wife and three boys for the third year. I'm proud of my sister in law who is really super mom and handles it so well. Love you Jamie. I'm proud of my friend Joy who struggles with Cystic Fibrosis who found out she was pregnant after her hubby left to fight the war on terror and went through her whole pregnancy with many complications and gave birth to their first child all while her husband was gone. I'm proud of my children and all the little kids on the base who halt in the middle of soccer practice or whatever they are doing to put their hand on their heart when the national anthem plays at 5pm everyday. There are a million stories all the same and I bet you they'd all say that it's worth it.

Our newest Family member

2009-04-20T13:07:00.000-07:00

Meet our newest family member. Jack Bauer. :) And to your surprise Jasper named him. I had no objections. :) He's 4 months old and his max weight will be 8 pounds! He's a bouncy ball of fun, house broken, major cuddler, plays great with Noel, sleeps through the night, and doesn't mind being carried around the house by a certain 3 and 4 year old! :) I'm pretty sure I'm in love.

We got my mama a puppy too. Pictures to come!

I'm baaaaack....

2009-04-13T14:03:00.000-07:00

First off, word to my girl Ashley for making me a SWEET header. :) I love you!

Okay I know I said a month, but the last two weeks have been A-MAZING. You missed me right? :) God has been so good to me (as always) but I feel like he has really been trying to show me something the last couple months and I've just been too stubborn to listen. What's new? Me stubborn? No way ;) Anyway, though I cannot say it was a pleasant learning experience, I am SO thankful for it. Nutshell: Stop focusing on what I think people (husband, children, family, friends) aren't doing for me and spend more time praying for them, and do more to serve and love them more! I can't tell you how much just that small change in mentality has brought me so much joy. It's not all about me (OBVIOUSLY :) actually it's not about me at all, and I am SO thankful for that. :) Enough said.

EASTER WAS A BLAST. Forget bunnies, the helicopter delivered eggs this year. Uh yeah. How sweet is that? Ashley invited us and minus a few set backs (blizzards, orange juice chaos, getting lost) we finally made it there and IT. WAS. SO. WORTH. IT. The kids had so much fun and I don't think I will ever hear the end of the "Easter Helicopter" Oh and the cutest thing, Miss Allie thought it would be a great idea to get a head start on gathering eggs so she ran out to the middle of the field before everyone else... her Mama of course grabbed her and quickly ran back! :) Chandler ran off in the midst of a few hundred people and was lost for a good 3-4 minutes. The longest minutes for me EVER. Yeah I cried. Phew-he was safe and at the other end of the field. Skylar gathered an overflowing bucket of eggs and is so generously sharing her treats with her favorite Mommy. :)

We brought some friends to the Easter production at our church THE THORN and I believe the Lord did some major work in their hearts. He is so good isn't he? Oh, and have you heard the news? HE IS RISEN!!! WHOO-HOOOOO!!!!!

We had a yummo lunch at my parents. My Dad is Greek (which makes me half Greek, just look at my Mediterranean bushy eyebrows and you will know for sure) :) so it is tradition that we eat lamb. It's DELICIOUS. Ethan wasn't too fond of it though. The kid is nuts, he practically eats anything (other than lamb obviously) and has no teeth. Forget baby food he is after the REAL stuff now. Wasn't he just born? Wow that went fast. Oh and by the way, it brought my heart so much joy to hear my four year old in the next room preaching to my unsaved brother and his girlfriend. "Jesus died on the cross for all your sins. Sins are the bad things that you do. But it's okay because he loves you and he's alive now. In heaven and in my heart." I'll never forget hearing that. He's so grown up now-and becoming a little man of God. I'm so proud of him.

Well I don't know what else to say accept GOD IS GOOD! LIFE IS GOOD! and I AM SO FULL OF JOY! :)

One last thing, check out Sarah's new Blog. She is an amazing person and you'll be missing out if you don't. :) Love ya girl!

Last update for a while...

2009-03-30T07:31:00.000-07:00

1. I'm taking a blogger break. A month, maybe more. I need to be having more tea parties with my little girl and jump out of more airplanes and parachuting (jumping off the couch with backpacks) with my son. My shaweet baby needs more snuggles from his Mommy.
I need to spend more time with my heavenly father, I feel like my relationship with him has really been taking second place to many things in my life and that is why I've been struggling so much. I'm so thankful that I have a father who loves me so unconditionally that even when I've rejected him, he holds out his arms to me and welcomes me back with such mercy.

Not that I can do all those things in the time it takes to blog :) but far less time on the computer is in order (among other things.) Including FB. I plan to only check that once in the AM and once in the PM only because that's where I make most my plans with people! :)

2. The surrogacy thing has been a big thing for me to deal with lately. I think it's had a big factor in my stress. I have been debating weather or not to blog about it, but decided it's a bit too personal. So if you know me in "real life" feel free to ask or shoot me an email. :)

3. I'm going to start reading again! I need to slow down on TV time. You think that would have happened when we got rid of cable! No thanks to Jack. :) I've picked out 4 books for this month. This one, this one, this one and this one. :) I'll do one a week. :) And we are reading this one for our small group. Which I love.

4. We watched a GREAT movie a couple nights ago. It brought it home for us. I love Kirk Cameron's movies. He has such a great ministry. OH FUN FACT! Kirk Cameron refuses to kiss any other woman other than his wife in movies SO for the kiss scene in the movie they only show the silhouettes of the kiss and it in fact, is his real life wife that he is smooching. How sweet is that?! Romantic indeed. What a great guy. I met him once a long time ago when he came to New Life. He was so nice!

5. We are bringing some great friends to the Thorn. Pray that they open their hearts to Jesus! I'm so excited to see it this year. I spent so many many years IN the Thorn, way back when it was just the death and resurrection and that's it! I'm excited to have not gone to a hundred rehearsals and see it "for the first time." :)

That's it for a while! Have an amazing month!

Gotta love THIS laundry pile!

2009-03-25T07:25:00.001-07:00

I love folding laundry when I have those baby blues looking at me from the pile!

Updates

2009-03-24T07:31:00.000-07:00

1. I have very little motivation to blog lately. Not so sure why... I've been having a rough few weeks lately not so sure why either! Just stressed to the max for some reason. It's weird. Normally I'm pretty easy going and happy go lucky. Don't know what else I can say about that...

2. Been taking lots of pictures. Like the one of Skylar as a butterfly? Had a newborn shoot last night where the baby screamed the whole time. Poor mama was at the end of her rope and the baby is only a week old. I don't miss that. You quickly forget how hard the first few weeks really are. I only got a couple pictures that I kinda like. We decided we'll try again in a few weeks just because there was only about 5 seconds in between calming the baby down before she started screaming again. Sigh... :) I'm going to make them dinner and get their 4 year old off their hands for a few hours on Wednesday.

3. I have been having migraines like you wouldn't believe. I would swear I'm pregnant because um my monthly visitor STILL isn't here and I usually only get migraines this bad when I am. BUT tests prove other wise. Probably due to stress too. Wow I'm whiny! This should be an Ughpdate not update!

4. JASPER IS ALMOST DONE WITH SCHOOL!!! WHOO HOO! We have a better game plan and it buys us a few extra years in Colorado. He goes to Germany for 6 months in January and can take on practically full time school while he is there, and then just about a year after he gets back he'll go to Greenland for a year (it's not an accompanied tour, which means we can't go because it's practically in the North Pole, Thule AFB) and can finish school then. When he gets back he gets a base of preference "BOP" and normally they would have moved us by then but since he gets a BOP we'll choose to stay here for 4 more years. In that time he will get commissioned as an officer and you can call him 1st Lieutenant Platt! :) hehehe Can't wait for the day...
I want to start a photography business and get serious about it and moving around like crazy doesn't help that. So this is why we chose this path. It will take a little longer for the Officer thing to become a reality BUT it will give me a chance to chase my dreams too. :) SPEAKING of dreams. I think I'll try this again this year. Not so pregnant looking. ;)

5. My kids are always saying funny things to me. Here's a couple from this week that I can remember.

I give Chandler a twizzler and he asks for two. I say no and he replies "But Jesus said two by two!"

Skylar on the T-Rex in Jurassic Park "Awwww he's so cute!"

Skylar "May I please have a peanut butter and Jelly sandwich without the peanut butter and without the sandwich?"

That's all I can think of...

Oki-dokie. That's all for now. What's new with YOU? Tell me! I really wanna know! :)

What a headache

2009-03-16T10:30:00.000-07:00

So I've had a little cold for about a week. For me it wasn't so bad but the kids have it a bit rough. It however has given me the worst headache ever. Okay that's a stretch... a really bad one then. For like 4 days STRAIGHT. SO I go to the doc for an early appointment to see if he could give me something because Tylenol and Motrin are not helping in the slightest. He gives me something for my cough, a couple things for my congestion, (okay NOT what I was looking for Doc) some more vitamin M even though I said it didn't help. I swear no matter whats wrong with you they give you Motrin to go with everything. Which is why you'll hear military folk call it vitamin M ;) Anyway, I get home and read the papers on the stuff he gave me. EVERY SINGLE ONE of the prescriptions first two side effects are.....you guessed it. Headaches. Nice. Thanks for your help Doc.

Skylar's Birthday Party

2009-03-12T08:36:00.000-07:00

What a blast! Skylar has been waiting for this birthday well since she was two. :) According to her life starts at the age of three . Pre school, soccer, gymnastics, oh the experiences! :) We had so much fun with some amazing friends, ate food that induced some serious sugar rushes, forgot to light the candles while singing happy birthday, opened presents galore with pink tissue paper flying all about. It was a good day indeed. Thank you for all who came and celebrated with us, we love you guys!

Click on the image to see all your beautiful faces enlarged!

Wordless Wednesday (sort of) on Tuesday Night :)

2009-03-10T21:32:00.000-07:00

Guess who? :)

hehehe Okay at least I'm cute in the top one! :)

Updates

2009-03-09T12:02:00.001-07:00

I really don't like the title "updates" anyone have better ideas?

1. In this economy I shall share a secret. Like make up? I do too. But it's so stinkin expensive. I don't recommend the foundation from this brand but everything else is great. AND it's all $1 and the mineral stuff is like $5. Sweeet. Eyes Lips Face. PLUS if you order $15 or more you get a free subscription to Glamour. Last time they were doing VOGUE.

2. I'm really excited about this and can hardly control myself! I'm going to be doing some contracting work for Megan. The best part is for a while I'll get to shadow her at some of her weddings and learn how she takes those amazing pictures. :) YAY!

3. I think I have to lay low from FB again. Man it's addicting. I have so many other things I have to do. Usually once I take a break I come back not so obsessed. I'll use it only for email proposes this week I think.

4. I'm getting so much better at running! I'm improving about a mile and a half a week! Boo-ya! Still no weight loss though! However I know that's due to pizza for breakfast and the comfort food I eat while Jasper does school. If I wasn't running I'd be gaining so much weight right now! lol Sigh... :) One thing at a time.

5. We decided to stick out Jasper's school for now. It's just going to take some discipline. He can only do M,W,F school at night and every other weekend take a test on Saturday. On those nights is when I'm going to work harder on cleaning rather than spending time with Jack Bauer. That way on his off nights we can spend together and not have to clean. He's going to have to up his game on how much he absorbs while studying and not demand perfection on his tests and I'm going to "not be so tired" (ha!) at night and get the house work done. Here goes week one. I'll let you know how it goes.

6. Oh Oh I put on a swim suit and it made me laugh. Good thing I'm swimming at the Y and not at South Beach! lol

7. Sky's birthday post coming soon. :) It was mucho funo. Thanks for all who came by!

8. I LOVE daylight savings! My kids are sleeping till 7:15!!!! I intend to keep it that way. I tip-toed around for an hour this morning getting everything ready for school and making breakfast and actually having time to put on makeup (gasp!) The best part? It means on the weekend we can sleep in for an hour!!! I'm going to try real hard to keep things this way. :)

Be blessed and have a FUNtabulous week. :)

Wordless Wednesday

2009-03-04T12:47:00.000-08:00

updates

2009-03-03T08:18:00.000-08:00

1. This has gotta be quick today because Sky is kinda cranky and needs a little extra love today I think. :) I did a fun mock wedding photo shoot with some friends this weekend. I'm having fun building my portfolio...

2. Skylar's party planning is going well. I'm excited about her cake. My mother in law is a genius at cake creations. I'm excited about princess galore! Sky is learning all the princess names and she likes Bell the best because "She got pwetty bwown hair like me."

3. My hubby is going to go to Germany in January for six months. We are actually really excited about this. It's great for his career and will get us completely out of debt. It's an answer to our prayers. However, it puts a complicated spin on the surrogacy. I'll leave that for another post though.

4. Okay it's time to admit. I broke my New Years Resolution. See? That's why I hate making them! Now I feel so disappointed in myself. It happened in February. We were all sick and stressed and I (we) broke. HOWEVER it's completely changed our soda habits... I used to drink (get ready) 2-3 cans a day. Yeah I know. It was my coffee. But NOW we drink 1 maybe 2 a week. SO it did help in a big way. But people, I need it every once in a while. It's my drug and unless they come up with a Coke-a-cola support group. I think a can a week won't hurt me. I'm trying to justify myself here. Just roll with it peeps.

5. Ethan needs to sleep through the night again. He's become so dependant on rocking and feeding through out the night (and day) to go to sleep, I get nothing done and Jasper gets no sleep (remember how I mentioned how great he was? Yeah, he still is. :) It's hard to let him cry it out for two reasons: My mam's heart aches to hear it and he shares a room with his brother. No good for brother. Often I walk in and Chandler has his pillow over his head... :( isn't that the cutest/saddest thing ever? I think Chan-man will have to have a few sleepovers in our room so we can let Ethan cry it out for a few nights. I know he's capable of sleeping 11 hours straight. Because he was. Before the stinkin RSV.

Alrighty. Must go. Love to all!

Cute video

2009-02-25T07:30:00.000-08:00

My sister in law sent this to me. It's cute.

Lets update shall we?

2009-02-23T07:30:00.000-08:00

1. We are all better! I felt like I'd never be able to say those words. Phew. In light of that we painted the room we planned for my studio and um it's waaaaaay to small. Dang. I guess I didn't realize how much room me equipment would take up. SOOO we are thinking about moving the computer desk down to that room (it's currently in our bedroom.) Ethan into our room. Sky stayed with us till she was one-so I've done it before. It's not that bad. And Chandler into Skylar's room. Of course her room is decked out in purple with butterflies and flowers so we'll have to change that too :( . I'm having the hardest time coming up with a theme that would be fun for both of them. We'll see. So then I'll take Chandler's room which is pretty big. It's quite a project. But I had fun shooting my neighbor. Her and her husband are having their 10th anniversary and she wanted a picture done to give him. I have such a long way to go to becoming the photographer I want to be but as my husband reminded me it's not about getting to the destination it's about the journey. So I'm excited to see where it takes me.

2. After Ethan's bout with RSV he hasn't been sleeping through the night at all. :( But I'm lucky. Jasper gets up with him and feeds him every night. Every night. He's so great. Man I love that guy. Speaking of that stellar guy. I gotta say I don't think I've ever met a kinder, loving, hardworking, passionate man. He is working his tail feathers off to become an officer. He gets up (well we get up) at 6, he leaves at 6:45 he's home at 5:15 we eat, then he baths, reads to and puts the kids to bed (it's his only time with them.) By then it's about 7:30. We chat for about 30 minutes and then he's off to study till about 10:45 (which includes, Friday, Saturday and Sunday night studying.) Doesn't leave much time for us. It's reeeeeeally hard, and lonely. I miss him so much. But we are strong enough for this and we are determined to succeed in life and not settle for less. We had kids so young and in many peoples cases that stops them from reaching their full potential. We won't let it. We can make it through this next year and a half of crazy school stuff. So if you see him give him a pat on the back because he deserves it for being an amazing husband, an incredible father, a diligent worker, and all without complaint (seriously the man doesn't complain. Ever. It's almost annoying. :) Any way I dunno how that went into a brag session about my hubby but you gotta brag sometimes right? ;) Love you babes. So much.

3.All the yummo food that was brought to us this week opened up my eyes to so many food possibilities. You kinda get stuck in a rut of eating the same things every week. This was so refreshing and we'll defiantly be adding more of those kinds of meals to our menu. So thanks guys!

4. My house is kinda messy and I have alotta laundry BUT I've decided I don't do housework on Mondays anymore. That way Monday is not so bad. ;)

5. I'm thinking about taking the kiddos up to the Childrens museum in Denver. It's soooooo amazing. You could spend all day there. Anyone want to make a trip out of it with me? I have military discount, and willing to share the wealth! ;)

6. Okay I am soooo behind on the running. Having a sick house for a month is a good enough excuse. Jasper and I are hitting the Y this afternoon (he can get off an hour and a half early today if he goes to the gym. Isn't that funny?) to see where we are at. We may have to push it to a race in May.

7. Surrogacy stuff is taking FOREVER. But I guess the longer it takes that just means I won't be a cow in the summer. Moo.

Alright enough for now. Time to play. Have a fantabulous day. :)

RSV

2009-02-20T10:50:00.000-08:00

After everyone in my house was sick for what felt like forever it finally started to let up. Finally. Then Thursday night we got home from our small group and Ethan could barley breathe Skylar was coughing like crazy (she had pneumonia) and Chandler was running a fever. Oy. We were up most of the night and in the morning tried to make an appointment for all the kids. They were booked and we ended up at the ER. I just burst out crying in the waiting room. I told Jasper I did not want to spend five hours in the ER today. I was just so tired of everyone being sick I just wanted to stay home and relax and everyone just feel better! Ha. Little did I know that 5 hours would turn to 3 days. Skylar and Chandler got sent home with some meds and they stayed with my in-laws the first night and my parents the next. Sky seemed to have come down with a tummy bug on top of it. Poor baby. Ethan was not so lucky. His oxygen levels were between high 60's to 70's (it should AT LEAST be a 90.) He had breathing treatments that weren't working and then they came in with four needles for steroid shots because they had to get him breathing better. I said "uh no." Granted I didn't want them to put an IV line in because he was still eating okay but I'd much rather him be poked once than 4 times and they weren't going to add a drip to it unless he needed it. So I had them do that instead. I couldn't watch but Jasper said the nurse did a good job and worked quickly so it was worth it. We were admitted and were there from Friday morning till Sunday night. He was such a trooper the whole time. And he came out of it being much more of a cuddle bug than before! I remember holding him and he had his head on my shoulder and his little arm around me and he pat my back a few times. It was so sweet. It was like he knew how worried I was and he was reassuring me that he was okay.

We had some amazing friends come by and gave us goodies and prayed for our little baby. It meant the world to us. On top of that our small group leader arranged for meals to be brought to us over the week. So I haven't cooked since I've been home. A much needed break. For a bit there I felt like I was going to fall off the edge and our friends came to the rescue and offered a helping hand. Just what we needed. :) Joanna posted this. And I couldn't agree more.

Also I've been leaning more towards natural/alternative medicines. And Sara brought me some stuff for Ethan while we were in the hospital. The Doctors perscribed him amoxicillin for his ear infections ( I guess that happens with RSV sometimes) and I decided not to use it. Instead I used silver. When we took him back to the Doc yesterday to see if he could come off his oxygen (Which he could! His stats were 98! :) they checked his ears and said "Wow his ears look amazing! Looks like the amoxicillin worked great!" Sure it did. :)

I have a picture of Joanna in this same getup. Mask & gown. She has a six month old also so we had to be cautious. I promised her I wouldn't post it. :)

Feelin' better and ready to go home already!

Chan watching some cartoons while waiting to go home.

Such a sweet girl, even when she's not feeling good.

Under Construction

2009-02-17T21:13:00.000-08:00

Okay I started "redesigning" my blog. And now I'm too tired to finish so if stuff looks "ew" then I'm sorry. I'll work on it. Sometime. :)

Diamond Castle

2009-02-10T09:29:00.000-08:00

It's been a reeeeeally rough week (and 4 days) with ear infections, backaches, Flu, stomach bugs, and pneumonia BUT at least I had this amazing (sense the sarcasm) song stuck in my head all the time because well it was on my tv EVERY DAY more than once a day. :) Sigh... You really should watch it and then imagine hearing it ALL THE TIME not to mention watching Barbies mouth move along with the words it just plain creepy. They should use it as a torture method on 24.

Jasper scheduled leave a couple of months ago for this week so we could "vacation." We planned to go to the Aquarium, the Zoo, the Children's Museum, and Jasper and I were planning on going ice climbing. Exactly like rock climbing but on ice. BUT obviously there was a change of plans. I was pretty mad about everyone getting sick right as Jasper took leave but then God gave me little bit of a change of heart. He knew how rough this week was going to be and knew that there would have been no possible way I would have been able to handle it on my own therefor Jasper taking his leave this week was the biggest blessing. So for that I am thankful.

Okay now I'm off to bleach every thing bleachable to get rid of this bug. Green works is not cutting it obviously. It's time to bring out the big guns.

Team Hoyt

2009-02-05T08:06:00.000-08:00

Read this and then watch this. I thought maybe I would cry but I bawled. What an incredible father.

When asked what one thing Rick wished he could give his father, his reply was "The thing I'd most like is that my dad would sit in the chair and I would push him once."

Updates and such things

2009-02-04T07:35:00.000-08:00

I slept a grand total of 2 hours last night so please excuse me if parts of this post make no sense. :)

1. I gotta say. Income tax season is my favorite holiday. It is a holiday right? At least while my kids are under 18 it will be. :) It provides the crisp feeling of financial relief in the air. The smell of credit cards being paid off and cut up. The warm glow of the desperately needed new computer monitor. It is my favorite holiday. :) **hehe** ANY WAY tax season also brought me my hearts desire. She will be arriving in the mail with in 2-3 business days. I'm "booking" everyone willing to say cheese or hand me their new baby so I can take pictures of them "to build my portfolio." I got some stuff to build a little home studio. I. AM. SO. EXCITED. Photography was always something I wanted to do and was told I'd be good at. My Dad bought me this perdy old Canon when I was 12 and I fell in love. So here I start my journey of becoming a photographer. Maybe one day I'll get my pictures in Vogue! :) Doesn't hurt to dream...

2. I put out an ad for a model (really I did!) and a horse. And my inbox became crammed with pictures of both models and horses! :) It's actually kinda fun! I felt a twinge of power. I picked this beautiful horse with awesome coloring (he actually kinda looks like a cow-all black and white) and a girl that is very beautiful and unique looking. I'm paying her with my pictures. :) Plus who doesn't want to ride a bareback horse right?! :)

3. I'm pretty sure I have caught a serious disease. It's called cantstopsmoochingethan. It's rough. I mean he gets cuter every day and I just can't control my cantstopsmoochingethan out breaks. I think they have treatments out there on the market but the side effects don't seem to out weigh the benefits. The warning was "Smooching with drawls may occur and make you unable to function" It's just not worth it. :) I told you I only got 2 hours of sleep.

4. I got a membership to the YMCA!!! I am thrilled! I struggle to go to the gym (we have one on base) at night (when J can be with the kids) after a long day and after dinner. There is just no motivation there. NOW since they have childcare I can go during the day! It will be fun for the little chickens, a break from them for me, AND it should make the days pass by a little more quickly. Not to mention I am pretty behind on my runs and April is approaching fast.

5. Okay. I'm going to lay on the couch and see if I can get away with a 15 minute nap while I let the kids run wild. shhh... don't tell.

My house is ALWAYS clean.

2009-01-31T17:45:00.001-08:00

Do your dishes ever get this bad?

I know mine don't.

Precious child

2009-01-28T07:30:00.000-08:00

I get to kiss those little feet every morning. I get to smell the sweet breath of my baby boy. I look at him and I see my husbands beautiful blue eyes. I can't even imagine what life would have been without my precious children and I don't want to. Getting pregnant was very easy for me. All my husband had to do was look at me and the pregnancy test showed two pink lines. :) I never had to wait month after month or year after year hoping for a miracle, only to get my heart broken once more. I was so lucky that it was so easy for me. Many woman out there don't have it as easy. They are mothers without children.

A friend of mine had a baby this past October and she gracefully handed him over to a beautiful couple who couldn't carry their own baby. All the brokenness and pain melted away for them at that moment. After a lot of prayer and decision making this lead me to want to be a surrogate. There are so many stories out there of families who are incomplete. Here is one of them.

Madeleine was told if she wanted to have children she would have to start now. Just engaged to he beloved fiance it was going to be a long journey. Just after they got married they started fertility treatments and eventually conceived a baby through IVF. She had a pregnancy that most of us couldn't imagine. You know those worse case scenarios in what to expect when you are expecting? She had many of them. As a hair would fall from her head and land on her pregnant belly she was overtaken by excruciating pain. After a very long 9 months she gave birth to her healthy baby boy. All the joy was quickly tainted as she was told she wouldn't be able to carry a baby again and an emergency hysterectomy was performed. She knew her family was not yet complete.

When I met her we clicked instantly. A former photographer and actress we had plenty to talk about. You may have seen her on TV a time or two! It's like we've known each other for years. Her and her husband currently work in the TV business here in Colorado and have a sweet 3 year old little boy-who wants a sibling! Soon we'll be connected for life as I've agreed to carry her child. After the birth she hopes that I want to be involved as kind of an Auntie. WOULD I EVER! :) She had embryos frozen 5 years ago and only one shot left at having another baby. Depending on how many survive the thaw they are hoping to transfer 3. The condition of the embryos are frail and it will be a fairly intense (restrictive) pregnancy. There is a chance that they may not take and she won't be able to have more children. We are all praying for a happy ending to her long journey and I am so excited to be able to be a part of it.

I'm about to dive into an intense medical process of medications, medical evaluations, psychological evaluations, and eventually in vetro fertilization. I could be pregnant with in 8-10 weeks or it may take a few months. It all depends how my body handles all this.

Wow it feels good to get that out! I've wanted to get it out in the open for a while (and almost couldn't contain myself a few times!)

I'm so excited and if you know me I love an adventure and plan to have many in my life. This will be a great one. But wait there is more. :) As some may know surrogacy pays well. If you know me you know my heart for Africa and my heart for orphans. This pregnancy is not only going to be a blessing for me to do but will bless me with the ability to go with my husband and two oldest children to Ghana the summer of 2011 and do some major relief work. I'll finally be able to go and take care of some of those precious children.

Thanks for listening, I'd love to hear what you think!

Oh and FYI it will be their baby biological. :) I've been asked how I'm willing to give up my baby. I would NEVER do that. Just thought I'd add that in case any of you were wondering.

Keeping Secrets

2009-01-27T21:27:00.000-08:00

So I've been keeping a big secret lately about a "job" opportunity. Last June I decided it was something I wanted to do. Now that everything seems to be in order I'm ready to share. But not tonight because I'm tired. :)

I left the picture as a clue.
See you in the morning, night or noon.
Whenever I get a chance, I'll be sure to tell you!

I thought that all rhymed, but I guess not. :) Tomorrow is the big news!

Money, Money, MONEY!

2009-01-27T14:44:00.001-08:00

Interesting...

Monday Morning

2009-01-26T08:11:00.000-08:00

My morning.

4:45 Ethan is up. Mumble to Jasper "Can you pleeeease feed him?" 5:15 hear Jasper stumble back to bed. I grumble something about how annoying it is that Ethan is waking up early lately. He agrees. My mind starts thinking about photography ideas. I yell to myself in my head. STOP IT IRENE! Just go back to sleep. I drift off. 6am the alarm clock wakes us up - aka Skylar. I make my way down the stairs. Say a swear word because I step on an extremely sharp Lego. Okay it was a regular Lego but it HURT. I hear Skylar say "Damn it." I say "No don't say that. Mommy is bad. Mommy is sorry. "

I make Jasper lunch for work. He looks really cute in his blues as usual. See the dog sleeping on the clothes I laid out for the kids. Yell at her to get off. Roll my eyes. Remove all the hair with the lint roller. Kids start fighting at the breakfast table. I holler at them to stop. They don't. I run upstairs to put on whatever I can find. Matching or not. Ends up not matching. Whatever. Run down stairs get the kids dressed. Run upstairs looking for my other shoe. Run down stairs. WHERE IS MY SHOE?! Run upstairs. Find shoe in bath room. Step in water with my socks. Find new socks. Find Skylar undressed and Chandler protesting about his clothes. I try put Sky's clothes back on, she runs away. I catch her. Snap at her. Put them on again. Threaten time out if she takes them off again. Tell Chandler "you ARE wearing that and I don't want to here about it anymore." He cries. I look at the time. 7:03 I debate taking a shower after already getting ready. I feel gross. I run upstairs to the shower. Baby wakes up. I tell Chandler to go talk to Ethan while I shower. I jump in and take a "missions trip shower" 3 minutes. Jump out dry off. Brush my hair. Crap. Didn't wash all the conditioner out. Jump back in the shower and try again. Jump out dry off. Get dressed. Go to Ethan and his blue eyes and toothless smile melts my heart. I coo. Realize I'm late. Grab him run down stairs. Put him in the walker. Dry my hair. Put on my make up. Grumble to myself about still breaking out. Realized last night it's from watching 24. Seriously. Brush through Skylar's hair. Feed Ethan. Enlist Chandler's help to hold the bottle for a minute. Put every one in their jackets, hats gloves. Put Ethan in his car seat. 7:41. Trudge out into the snow. OUCH, it's cold. Kids fight over who gets to open the door. I say loudly MOMMY IS OPENING THE DOOR. Both cry. We load up in the car and I hear Ethan blowing up his diaper. I say "You are going to have to sit in that."

Can't figure out how to turn the heater on in the new van. Too many friggin buttons.

Drive to school. We sing songs about frogs. Get excited about finding a parking spot. Get everyone out the car. Ethan starts fussing about his diaper. Chandler starts crying because his ears are cold. I say that's why I told you to wear your hat. He cries because it was dirty. It was not. Make it to the class room. Sign Chan in. We all exchange hugs and kisses. Out we go. Again. Get stormed by a bunch of 2nd graders. Walk against the stinging cold wind. Ethan cries. Sky says she's "sooooooo cold mommy." "Me too baby." I accidentally bonk her head while buckling her in. She yells at me. I tell her to use nice words. I say sorry. Kisses don't work on owies anymore. :( Ethan screaming. Probably poopy diaper and being cold combination.

Drive to the gate. Drop my ID. Gate guard looks annoyed-and cold. I feel around my car. HOW CAN IT DISAPPEAR?! Take off my gloves. Apologize as a huge string of cars form behind me. There it is. Drive to house. Ethan hysterical at this point. Skylar says shes cold. Again. Make it home.

Get in the house. Screaming baby looks a little relieved. Change a diaper. Change his clothes. Pick him up. Do a little silly dance with him talking in squeaky high pitch voice. He laughs. Throws up. On me. On him. Sigh. Too much dancing. Change his clothes. Wipe mine off. He's just going to do it again later. Put Ethan in Walker. Get blow dryer and point it up my pant legs. I'M STILL SO COLD. Skylar giggles. I do it to her too. She says "My bottom is cold!" I blow dry her bottom. :)

Set up a movie for Skylar. She wants rocket. No wait Lumpy. No Cars. "SKYLAR!" Cars. She wants Cars. I get her blanket and pillow. Make her hot Chocolate. Knowing she doesn't even like to watch TV, this will only last 15 minutes.

And so on and so on and so on. This is my Monday morning all before 10. Crazy. But I love it. :)

Can't believe you read all that. :)

FUN WITH FRIENDS!

2009-01-25T16:50:00.000-08:00

Okay I'm a little late in posting but the weather was so nice out we had a fun day out with Joanna, Kadence and Keaton.

Joanna getting a great arm workout pushing Kadence and Chan.

Now doesn't this just work out awesome?!

My lil' sweetie.
I love this face. It's like he's saying, "Look lady, you've taken 20 pictures of me. I'm not going to smile for you right now, so would you please stop talking in that squeaky voice and push the swing already?"

Thanks Joanna for hanging out with us! Can't wait for the summer to have more fun days like this!

Ethan's opinion on the President-Elect

2009-01-16T15:30:00.000-08:00

All about me!

2009-01-16T12:46:00.000-08:00

Sara tagged me, and I love these things! So here are 16 things about me...

1. I'm extremely organized and very messy. Both at the same time. I have organized messes. :)

2. I'm a "cook by the recipe kind of person" I'm not brave enough to try my own experiments in fear of messing them up.

3. I was born and raised in South Africa. Peoples reactions amuse me. "And you re not black?" "Did you live in a hut?" "Were there Giraffes in your back yard?" I'm serious. People actually ask these things.

4. I make jokes when I'm nervous.

5. I'm terribly insecure and shy. I never used to be, but after I had kids it kinda seemed to happen. Maybe the lack of adult conversation?

6. I hate it when people make sure I know that they are "better" than me. Like when you can't have a conversation with someone with out them saying "I've already done that, or my husband did that ages ago, or my kid is too smart to go to preschool" ARRG. It drives me nuts.

7. I'm very sensitive and easily get my feelings hurt. I feel like when people challenge my opinion that they challenge me personally.

8. I have a heart for African Orphans. (As if that wasn't already clear.) We'd like to adopt at least 3 (maybe a sibling group.)

9. I weigh my self every day. More than once. I hate it.

10. If I had more than one life to live I would have been an astronaut, an archaeologist, work for the secret services (and this was in fact something I wanted to do before I ever saw 24 people) :) an actress, a singer, a fire fighter, Indiana Jones the girl version. Wait that would be Laura Croft wouldn't it? Okay, Laura Croft.

11. I co-hosted a talent show with Miss California (2001 I think?) and the guy that plays Greg Brady on the on the Brady Bunch in L.A. when I was 15. I was called back to do jobs in L.A. (one which was a MTV Pepsi commercial) however my parents could not risk just moving our whole family to L.A. :*( I was so sad that I told people I did the commercial anyway.) I have it (talent show) on VHS. I'll see if Jasper can convert it and upload it for you guys.

12. I have 15 unfinished scrapbooks and after all that work I realized I much prefer to do them on here.

13. I'm not a big sleep cuddler. I need my sleeping space. Unfortunately my husband is a huge sleep cuddler. So I do the hug and roll.

14. Chipoltle is my favorite. I once had it 4 times in one week when pregnant with Ethan. It's like a thousand calories for one meal, which might be why I gained 35 stinkin pounds while pregnant.

15. I throw socks away often. I can't wear old socks. 6 months tops.

16. I really truly think I have the sweetest husband ever. :)

So I tag Sarah and Sara and Joanna (Joanna you've been tagged twice now so you know what that means in blogger world, you HAVE to do it. ;)

SHE'S BACK!

2009-01-16T08:10:00.000-08:00

She's back! And it makes me cry tears of joy. What an amazing woman.

Updates and such

2009-01-12T10:26:00.001-08:00

1. It's defiantly Monday. With snow on top of it. I'm like Garfield, I hate Monday. I had to drag all the kids out in the snow to take Chandler to school. It should have been a snow day. 7:30 is way to early to be outside with the kids in full snow gear trudging to the school building. I don't like winter. Grumble, grumble.

2. I'm breaking out like a 14 year old lately. I've always had trouble with my skin. I've tried every prescription and non-prescription out there and nothing seems to help. Any suggestions?

3. My house is a disaster and I just don't know where to start. And as soon as I do start Ethan wants to be held or something. I did a deep clean a couple weeks ago where I stayed up till 2am and now it's dirty again. AGAIN! Aaaurrg.

4. I have an amazing opportunity presented to me right now. I'm excited and terrified at the same time. I'm so wanting to talk about it but not sure I should until I've made my decision. So please pray for me to have wisdom this week to hear God clearly on this. I'll probably let the cat out of the bag next week.

5. I have a tiny 30 minute eye surgery tomorrow. I got this thing in my eye like 6 months ago. I guess it's a blocked gland or something. So they are going to take it out. I'm not excited. This is almost as bad as going to the dentist. Almost.

7. I've been having spinach and mushrooms on everything lately. I just can't get enough! Anyone have any good recipes involving the two?

8. I'm am getting all my studio equipment come end of February. So PLEASE I need volunteers to build a portfolio! No charge and I'll give you a few edited prints and a CD of your pics!

9. I can't believe how big Ethan is getting. He's so full of personality and I just can't get enough of him. He's just started "talking" and at 6am the sound of his sweet little babbles is really the best way to wake up.

10. Jasper gets a few extra days off these next couple weeks and I've always said "I wish for one day I could just sit in bed and watch TV ALL DAY LONG." My dream is coming true. He's giving me a whole day in bed with my recent obsession 24. Isn't my hubby amazing?! I have 5 seasons to catch up and this will knock out a whole season. Jack Bauer is my hero. :) And he's cute too! I like (fictional) grungy guys with guns. :) hehehe

11. It's now lunch time and the wolves I mean kids are hungry. Cheers!

Hungry Children

2009-01-10T07:59:00.000-08:00

Please visit Anita's blog and consider helping these children. Every night you get to put your children to bed with full tummies and there are so many little bellies aching for just one meal. You CAN help. Thanks.

A happy ending to a tragic beginning

2009-01-09T07:31:00.000-08:00

I thought this was an incredible story! What an amazing bond between sisters. What are your opinions on surrogacy?

Looking back...

2009-01-08T20:55:00.000-08:00

I was just looking through old pictures and these snake ones made me laugh! I remember Skylar even tried to kiss that huge python bye bye! Mommy said no.

Summer of 07 at the Denver Aquarium petting zoo. This was right after Jasper got home from joining the military. He was gone only for about 7 months. So much has happened since then, it's crazy to look back. I can't believe he's officially been in the Air Force for 2 years this week.

Congratulations honey on your two year anniversary in the Air Force. You have come so far and accomplished so much. I'm SO PROUD of you and so lucky to be your wife. Not only are you a stellar Airman :) but a stellar husband and father. I can't wait to see the amazing things you do in this life and the all goals you accomplish. I KNOW you can do anything. I will stand "next to you" ;) every step of the way. I love you with everything that I am. MUAH! And goosie kisses. ;)

"When I grow up I want to be Daddy and drink coffee" - Chandler

Good choice buddy. :)

Running

2009-01-05T09:59:00.000-08:00

Jasper surprised me with these (in pink) to help train for my half marathon in April. YAY! My ear canals are just too small for the tiny ones you put in your ear and I have to have music when I run. Have to, or else I just think too much about how hard it is and don't get very far.

Also my friend Rachel from Alabama has been training for a marathon (26.6) miles that she's doing this weekend at Disney World. She's going to make me a schedule to build up to the 13.3 I'm going to have to do. Jasper and I have always talked about doing triathlons and marathons together, I think it's finally becoming a reality! I'm so excited!

Wow. I'm going bloggy crazy this week. I think I better chill (for the day hehe) because Chandler is climbing all over me and it's making it quite a challenge to type. :)

Big Jet Birthday

2009-01-05T06:34:00.000-08:00

Chandler's birthday was a blast. We had so many people crammed into our small house it wasn't even funny. One of these days we need to upgrade to the four bedroom we qualify for on base. I just can't find motivation to move AGAIN. Chandler got lots of new toys (like he didn't get enough for Christmas) including two lightsabers. I have been attacked by two little Jedi's constantly since the party. I keep hiding those things and they keep finding them! :)

The Big Jet cake (from little Einsteins.) My mother in law made this whole thing including the jet. FROM SCRATCH! She's awesome.

I had to convince him he was still four. He insisted he was five because he had a birthday at school where he turned four so if he was having another birthday at home it meant he was five. :) So cute.

Brad pulling Skylar over to the dark side. Say no to xbox Skylar, say no!

Thanks to his Daddy, I lost him to the 360 a long time ago. He even has the video game face.

At least my little Chunky Monkey is still innocent! Look that double chin!

My young padawon learner. (Is that how you spell padawon?) :)

"Uncle" Brad aka "the motorcycle"

Jobs

2009-01-03T21:42:00.000-08:00

My kids love it when I give them jobs. It makes them feel important, keeps them busy, and helps me out. I know they are now completely capable of cleaning up after themselves and helping with little chores around the house. So I made a poster of pictures (since they obviously can't read) of the things they can help with. They'll have 3 a day and they are small quick jobs like feeding the dog, or emptying the small trash cans. Their name (on the Popsicle stick) will be in the pocket of their designated "job". I think they'll love this and I'm so excited about getting help! Plus they'll each get a shiny quarter to put in their piggy banks at the end of the day. ;)

Thank you little bear

2009-01-02T19:52:00.000-08:00

Okay I think it's safe to say Ethan is sleeping through the night! It started 10 days ago and he sleeps 10 1/2 hours STRAIGHT!

It all started with him. As soon as Ethan moves or makes a noise he turns on and makes "soothing" noises. That got my little man sleeping 10 1/2 hours straight. All of a sudden. The night we got him.

For. 10. Days. Straight. :)

Praise Jesus for sweet sweet sleep.

Resolution (just one this time)

2008-12-31T23:15:00.000-08:00

This was my New Years Resolutions post from last year. Ha!

This year I'm going for a much easier list.

I'm giving up soda for a year. That's it. When I make these long lists I can't focus and they fizzle. I have a partner in crime for this one so it may last. He's pretty good at this kind of thing.

I don't have any deep reflections or wise words to post about the new year. I just feel so happy and am hoping for a great year.

Oh I have a confession. I had two glasses of wine and 1 shot tonight! [gasp] It's been about a year and a half since I had a drink and it will probably be another year and a half before I have another one. :) It's just not our thing. We had our friends over (spontaneous change of plans I guess) and we were influenced. :)

Have a happy New Year!

Christmas and updates

2008-12-31T09:52:00.000-08:00

Whew. What. A. Week.

1. Christmas was AMAZING this year. We didn't have a lot of money which was honestly really nice. It meant we had no expectations and that was a really relaxing frame of mind. We were surprised however when a contracting squadron family decided to sponsor our Christmas! They asked us for a wish list and brought us presents! I just can't explain how much of a blessing it was. Not necessarily the stuff but the fact that someone could care so much for strangers really blew me away. :) We did a Christmas eve breakfast at my in-laws then headed to church for a wonderful Christmas eve service then headed to my parents for some dinner and gifts. Phew. We were pretty beat by the end of the day. We headed off to bed hoping for Santa's arrival. ;) Then at 6:30am (I know, seriously kiddos SLEEP IN FOR ONCE) the kids were ready to see what Santa had brought.

2. I feel like God gave me a big pop quiz and my grade turned out to be an A. The whole thing with Chandler really broke my heart when I heard the news. The more I though about it though I realized, "God he is your son just as he is mine. You love him more than I possibly could. (Which as a mother is hard to imagine.) You have plans for him and I have Faith in you that he's going to be okay." This gave me so much peace. As we walked into the pediatrics surgery yesterday I was ready for whatever God wanted to put on my plate. After all, I've learned that he will never give me more than I can handle. Turns out maybe that's why God let this all happen. He wanted me to surrender to him, so I did and this is what the Doctor said. "The cyst is a little larger than average but it's location is key. As long as it doesn't grow it's not going to harm him at all. In two years we will do another MRI to check and make sure it's not active and if it's not we'll forget about it." Done. I'm so thankful and I've learned so much from this. He is in control.

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Jeremiah 29:11
I believe this more than ever.

3. Jasper's new squadron and all the spouses are doing a half marathon in April. 13 miles. I can't be the only one to chicken out, so I have accepted the Challenge and begin training tomorrow. :) I'm very, very competitive so I'm pretty sure I can do this. :) Yay!

4. Jasper was off for nine days for Christmas worked a half day Monday and a full day today then he's off for four more. I think when he goes back I might go into some serious with drawl and so will the kids. I just love having him home it's so fun and easy! :) I might have to prepare some fun activities to ease us into a normal schedule again.

5. We are going to the Denver Museum of Nature and Science on Friday. The new Dinosaur exhibit ends on the 4th so "WE HAVE TO GO!" according to the Chan man. We are a little bit of Museum junkies anyway. Can't wait, this will be Ethan's first visit. Well he went twice while in my tummy, but I suppose that doesn't count.

6. For New years we are staying in and having a little party with the kids and will put them to bed late (8:30! hehe) and enjoy a quiet evening to ourselves. I'm surprising Jasper with a yummy steak dinner and a movie rental. A date night in! Oh and we made a New Years Resolution to not drink soda for a year. THAT is gonna be tough, but I'm up for it. Soda is so bad for you anyway. I don't know why we poison our selves with it. Okay yes I do. It's DELICIOUS! Hehe. HAPPY NEW YEARS FOLKS! IT'S GONNA BE A GREAT YEAR!

From us to you

2008-12-25T16:29:00.000-08:00

Merry Christmas and may God bless you!

Brain Cyst

2008-12-23T12:36:00.000-08:00

So it turns out Chandler's MRI did not come back clean as we had thought. He has this in his brain. He has an appointment with a neurosurgeon on the 30th.

Um, I'm not sure I have much else to say other than I'm scared and please please please pray for my baby.

Chandler's School Party

2008-12-22T20:16:00.000-08:00

Chandler-aka: The Bing, Ms. Chanandler Bong, Muscles, Pnut (all names he responds to and refers to him self as)

Age: 4 as of Dec. 29th

Personality: Compassionate, Shy, Tender hearted, Comedic, and oh so Silly.

Chandler had his "school birthday" a few days ago. We brought cupcakes and arrived a little early so we could watch what he does in class and it was SO cute. I just can't believe how big he is getting. He has really come so far since he started school in August. He's writting his own name, learning to read a little bit, he's made so many new friends and I'm just so proud of the little man he's becoming. Every student brings snack one day a month and a couple weeks ago a classmate brought in Sponge Bob gummy snacks. He told his teachers he would not eat them because Sponge Bob is bad and says bad words. :) Way to stand up for what you believe in kiddo! He also brought his Bible in for show and tell at the beggining of the year and it was his choice of what to bring. Already on the right track. :) I love my sweet, shy, sensitive, silly, lovable little man and I have such high hopes for him. Happy Birthday Bing.

Telling the class that it was his birthday. And that Mommy made everyone yummy Cupcakes. (Ahem, thanks walmart bakery)

Here comes the sugar rush in 5,4,3,2,1...

The Birthday boy.

Just plain silly. :)

A cute little song they sang just after we came in.

Australia

2008-12-21T18:53:00.000-08:00

If you haven't seen Australia I insist that you do. It was the best movie I have EVER seen. Absolutely my favorite. I also learned things that I never knew happened in World War two. It was incredibly interesting, romantic, exciting, educational, heart warming and very funny. I give it 10 stars. Seriously. Go see it. Right now. Go.

new day

2008-12-19T20:46:00.000-08:00

Eh. I deleted my last post because after reading it, it was just to whiney. I don't like whiney so much. I just had a terrible sad sad day and I cried way too much. But God is in control and he knows my heart. He's taking care of me.

Gotta put my faith in God more and less in man.

Sigh.

Tomorrow is a new day; this makes me happy. (did I use it right saraw?) :)

Nei-Nei

2008-12-17T07:53:00.000-08:00

I've been reading Stephanie Neilson's blog for a long time now. The day after Ethan's birthday she was in a plane crash with her husband. He was recently sent home from the hospital but she is still in a medically induced coma. She suffered burns over 80% of her body. I don't know why this happened to this amazing woman. She is an incredible mother and it breaks my heart for her that she has been away from her 4 children so long. I pray God heals her body and heart.

Her sister has taken over her blog and mostly re-posts her old posts "to keep her blogging spirit alive."

This one is hilerious. Read it and then take some time to get to know Nei-Nei. It will be such a rewarding blog for you to read. I promise!

I'm an addict

2008-12-16T19:02:00.000-08:00

I've seen every episode at least 10 times. I know, I know, not something to brag about. It could sound pathetic. But I am bragging. We even named our oldest child after our favorite character. We would have named the other two Monica and Joey, but we practiced self control.

You know how some people will have a nightcap before bed? Our nightcap is friends...

So tonight I share with you one of my favorite scenes...

Could I BE anymore obsessed?

Sticky Fingers

He is home.

Conviction

Psalm 139:14For YOU created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.1 Peter 3:3-4

Psalm 139:14

1 Samuel 16:7

The three letter swear word

Dear Chandler & Skylar

Ek is lief vir jou

I live in a zoo.

A trooper!

A nice and normal update. :)

God, who foresaw your tribulation, has specially armed you to go through it, not without pain but without stain . - CSLewis

Alligator

Weight loss

Joy will come

My sweet boy

HP touchsmart

So that's a breakdown...

Happy Halloween!

Tear jerker

This man...

whip lash

I feel so blessed I could just...

1 week down 26 (or so) to go...

I'm feeling...

A close call

super powers...

It's a wonderful life (part 2)

It's a wonderful life (part 1)

Chandler donates to Skylar

Blessed

updates

Quick update/ announcements

Happy Birthday Ethan!

WA-HOO!!!

The cutest thing!

It's done!

Whats up around here...

What do you have in your tummy?

Wordless Wednesday

A perfect date.

If only...

A memorial service that challenged my faith

Health update

Sweet little Isabella

A diagnosis or a divine challenge?

1 Corinthians 6:19

Monday, Monday!

Married to Superman

Wordless Wednesday

Really?!

Monday updates...on Wednesday. :)

SURPRISE!!!

Yet another one about him. <3

"These Airmen are literally on the picket lines for the country, They aren't only helping win our current wars; they also work every day to prevent attacks against our nation through the systems deterrent capabilities." -Chief Master Sgt. Richard Small

Pictures

Monday updates :)

Family forever. No matter what.

Dreaming of the future

Wordless Wednesday. A sneak peek.

United States Air Force

Our newest Family member

I'm baaaaack....

Last update for a while...

Gotta love THIS laundry pile!

Updates

What a headache

Skylar's Birthday Party

Wordless Wednesday (sort of) on Tuesday Night :)

Updates

Wordless Wednesday

updates

Cute video

Lets update shall we?

RSV

Under Construction

Diamond Castle

Team Hoyt

Updates and such things

Psalm 139:14
For YOU created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.
1 Peter 3:3-4